top of page
  • Writer's pictureSurviving Breast Cancer

How to Feel Positive About Life Again

By Kristen Carter

Making a collage or vision board can help you feel positive about life again.

Dear Kristen, I had these great dreams for the future, but now that I’ve had breast cancer I’m afraid to look ahead. What can I do to feel positive about life again? -K.J.

Dear K.J.,


Dreaming of the future is a uniquely human thing to do. We are the only species (that we know of) that can project ourselves into an imagined future. And those futures can be so lovely! Filled with love, babies or grown children, travel and adventure, professional success, and on and on.


Other species live in the moment, satisfying basic needs like eating and not being eaten.


It makes me wonder who has it better, them or us.


What you are experiencing is unfortunately so common among women with a breast cancer diagnosis and anyone who comes face-to-face with their mortality: we somehow lost trust in the future we’ve imagined.


On one hand, this should come as no surprise. Nothing is guaranteed, after all. On the other hand, it is so human to dream, and therefore we can’t stop ourselves from doing it.


What’s required here is radical acceptance. As the life coach Martha Beck says, “So what? Now what?” What do we do with the reality that is staring us in the face?


The answer is, we embrace it. This is our truth, right now, in this moment. Once we’ve done that, we can move forward. Until we accept what’s real, we carry our future dreams around like a giant piece of baggage.


Acceptance and setting down that bag of hopes and dreams will require some grieving. Let yourself mourn for what you’d hoped for. Then you can begin looking for what is actually around you, and go from there, perhaps even discovering new hopes and dreams.


What is around you? Family? Friends? Work? Hobbies? Take stock of what IS in your life, rather than what isn’t. How can you make the most of what you already have? If you can enjoy what is present, you have the key to happiness. I believe there is always something to be grateful for if we look for it.


And that is the way to feel positive about life again.


Tools I love to use when I need to feel grounded and to cultivate hope:

  • Writing in my gratitude journal before bed.

  • Calling an old friend I haven’t spoken to in a while and catching up on the phone (not zoom).

  • Making plans for the short-term future. It doesn’t have to be settling down and starting a family in five years, or a dream vacation; it can be a 5K road race coming up this summer.

  • My favorite tool is cutting up old magazines and making vision boards. It’s creative and gets me inspired every time I look at them. In fact, I have several around my house. Know that you are not limited to just one!


xo Kristen





Recent Posts

See All

Comments


Meditation Mondays:

Chakra Chanting with Gloria

Mondays at 10:00 a.m. ET 

RSVP

Thursday Night Thrivers:

All Stages Support Group

Thursdays at 7:00 p.m. ET

RSVP

 

Thursday Night Thrivers:

Metastatic Breast Cancer Support Group

First and third Thursdays

of the month at 7:00 p.m. ET

RSVP

 

Thursday Night Thrivers:

Inflammatory Breast Cancer Support Group

Second Thursday

of the month at 7:00 p.m. ET

RSVP

Tuesday Night Thrivers

Después de un Diagnóstico:

Grupo de Apoyo en Español

2do y Cuarto Martes de cada mes 

7:00 p.m. ET

RSVP​

Encourage and Empower

For Newly Diagnosed

September 10, 11:00 a.m. ET

RSVP

Breast Cancer Book Club

The first Sunday of the month

RSVP

Restorative Yoga:

Unearthing Opportunities

May 20 ,  5:30 p.m. ET

RSVP

In Body Breathwork

May 21 ,  6:00 p.m. ET

RSVP

Brain Spotting

May 27,  6:00 p.m. ET

RSVP

Qi Gong

May 28,  11:30 a.m. ET

RSVP

Art Therapy

June 3, 6:00 p.m. ET

RSVP

Forest Bathing

Jun 4,  6:00 p.m. ET

RSVP

Reflect & Recharge

Expressive Writing

June 10,  6:00 p.m. ET

RSVP

Yoga Fitness with Chair Assist

June 11, 11:30 a.m. ET

RSVP

Yoga Stretching for DIEP flap

June 11,  6:00 p.m. ET

RSVP

Más eventos en español

RSVP

Upcoming Events

1

Surviving Breast Cancer provides breast cancer support, events, and webinars at no cost to you! Whether you are looking to gain more knowledge on a particular topic or meet up with other breast cancer survivors, we have something for everyone. 

2

Our standing appointment on Thursdays is for all stages. We also host specific breakout groups once a month for specific stages and subtypes such as Metastatic breast cancer, and Inflammatory Breast Cancer, etc. 

3

The Book Club meets the first Sunday of every month at 11 am ET. You are welcome to join each month or pick and choose your month based on your availability and the book we are reading. 

4

Through art, writing, and other creative modalities, we hold the power to manage our stress, make sense of our now, and relax into moments of stillness. 

5

Free, monthly, online classes in restorative yoga, yoga for breast cancer, and Zumba. 

6

Después de un Diagnóstico

bottom of page