When Waiting for Test Results Breaks Your Trust in Good News
- Surviving Breast Cancer
- 39 minutes ago
- 3 min read
By Laura Carfang
Waiting for medical test results can feel like living in suspended animation. Time stretches. Thoughts spiral. You check your phone more than you realize. You refresh the patient portal even though you know nothing has changed. Your body stays tense, as if something is about to happen.
For many people impacted by cancer, the waiting can be just as distressing as the diagnosis itself. And sometimes, something unexpected happens.
You prepare yourself for the worst.
Let’s talk about why.
Preparing for the Worst as a Coping Strategy
There is a psychological concept called defensive pessimism. It describes what happens when someone anticipates a high-stakes outcome — like cancer test results — and mentally assumes the worst on purpose. This is not because people want bad news. But because certainty, even painful certainty, can feel safer than hope.
By imagining the worst-case scenario, the mind is trying to:
Reduce the shock if bad news arrives
Regain a sense of control
Emotionally “pre-grieve” what might come
For those diagnosed with cancer waiting on test results, and frantically refreshing the screen to your medical portal, this strategy is incredibly common. The challenge? When the results are good, your mind has already rehearsed catastrophe — and relief doesn’t land.
When Your Body Thinks Waiting = Danger
If you’ve been diagnosed with cancer, your brain has already learned something powerful: Waiting for results once changed everything. That memory doesn’t live only in our thoughts — it lives in our nervous system. Psychologists call this anticipatory anxiety or medical PTSD. It means your stress response activates before danger is confirmed.
When this happens:
Your body stays in fight-or-flight mode
You scan for threats, even after reassurance
Good news feels unreal, fragile, or temporary
You might think:
“They must have missed something.”
“This can’t be right.”
“I’ll believe it when more time passes.”
This isn’t disbelief; it’s your brain prioritizing safety over celebration.
The Whiplash of Good News
There’s also something called cognitive dissonance at play. If you’ve spent days or weeks organizing your life around the assumption that something is seriously wrong, your mind has already adapted. Then suddenly, you’re told: “Everything looks okay.” Your brain needs time to undo what it prepared for. Disbelief is often not denial — it’s lag time between threat and safety.
Hypervigilance Is Not Pessimism — It’s Protection
Many people feel guilty for not feeling relieved right away.
They wonder:
“Why can’t I just be happy?”
“What’s wrong with me?”
“Other people would be grateful — why am I still scared?”
Here’s the truth: Hypervigilance is a form of self-protection. Believing good news can feel like lowering your guard — and after a cancer diagnosis, that can feel dangerous. Your mind may be saying: “If I don’t fully trust this, I won’t be crushed if it changes.”
How Relief Actually Arrives (Hint: It’s Not All at Once)
For many cancer survivors, relief doesn’t come as a wave of joy.
It comes quietly:
Sleeping a little better
Taking a deeper breath without realizing it
Thinking about the future for a few seconds longer
Relief often arrives in increments, not declarations. You don’t have to force yourself to believe good news fully. You can let it be true for today.
Here is a mantra to stay grounded in the present moment: “The results are good right now, and that’s enough.”
If you’re struggling to trust good medical news:
You are not broken
You are not pessimistic
You are not doing survivorship “wrong”
Your body remembers how real the danger once was. And it is slowly — at its own pace — learning that this moment is different.
You don’t have to rush relief.
You don’t have to perform gratitude.
You don’t have to explain yourself.
If this resonates with you, please know: you are not alone in this experience. At SurvivingBreastCancer.org, we believe survivorship includes the emotional aftermath of waiting, fear, and uncertainty. Healing isn’t just about test results; it’s about giving yourself permission to feel exactly where you are.
Read More:
On the Podcast: Breast Cancer Conversations
Understanding and Coping with Medical PTSD in Cancer Care with Emily Parks
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