By Jill Rackham
In October 2020 my life totally changed forever,
I wondered how on earth I would hold it together.
Following being prodded, poked, scanned and investigated,
Breast cancer was confirmed and then life became much more complicated.
Cancer, surely this was not supposed to happen to me,
I thought I was too young for this at age forty three.
Next came invasive surgery, a part of me was taken.
All alone in hospital. Covid made sure visitors were forsaken.
Observing eyes, it's all I could see,
as everyone was wearing a mask around me.
A waiting game now, how far had my cancer spread,
This news became a huge moment of dread...
However I was silently cheering after my fear,
As good news was given, my lymph nodes were clear.
Treatment came next with side effects galore,
but at least the cancer was inside me no more.
Then another shock - an unexpected positive genetics result,
I felt life tumbling beyond my control just like a somersault.
Thrown into chaos again as my chance of cancer returning became higher,
My heart sank, my face and body felt like they were on fire.
"You need more surgery again", they said,
"We must do all we can to put this cancer to bed".
And so more surgery happened with complications this time,
More hospital visits followed, this life just didn't feel like mine.
Thoughts overflowing in my busy mind,
What a huge whirlwind of a time.
Time has moved on and 4 lots of surgery is now in the past,
Treatment continues and I hold hope the side effects won't last.
So much has happened, I can hardly believe it's to be,
But here I am, a newer version of me.
And so onwards and upwards in life I now will hopefully go,
Determined to keep smiling and simply go with the flow.
Connect with Jill and read more of her poetry on Instagram: @poems_to_help_you_through