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Weight gain is one of the many potential side effects of Letrozole, an Aromatase Inhibitor. In fact, “Will Letrozole make me gain weight?” is one of the most common questions asked in SBC’s weekly support groups . Not every person taking Letrozole gains weight; everyone's body responds differently to endocrine therapies. However, in today’s post, we are going to look at the most common factors associated with weight changes and provide some recommendations for combating the unwanted cushioning some develop as a result of this estrogen depletion. Join our mailing list and never miss out on great content! Why Do Some People Gain Weight from Breast Cancer Treatment? A large percentage of people report weight gain after a breast cancer diagnosis and treatment [1]. Explanations for the weight change can be attributed to lifestyle changes that normally come with a breast cancer diagnosis. For example, you may feel more fatigued and therefore reduce your level of physical activity. If you are on steroids, you may notice the feeling of being hungry more often. Increasing calories can also be associated with coping as you deal with the stresses of a breast cancer diagnosis [2]. Chemotherapy and Weight Gain Weight changes can also occur in younger women who are premenopausal during chemotherapy. The Women’s Healthy Eating and Living (WHEL) study [3] indicates that 65% of people treated with chemotherapy were more likely to put on a few extra pounds [3]. On average, women report gaining 2-5kg (approximately 4-11 lbs). However, that is not the time to worry about weight gain or to start a new diet plan. Remember, you are going through cancer treatment, and it is a time to be kind to yourself! How Does Endocrine Therapy Lead to Weight Gain? Chances are, if your cancer is hormone receptor positive, meaning that the cells have either estrogen or progesterone receptors, you will most likely be advised to take endocrine therapy as part of your longer-term treatment plan. Endocrine therapy, also known as hormonal therapy, reduces estrogen levels or blocks the estrogen receptor. In some cases, your oncologist will advise you to take Tamoxifen, or one of the Aromatase Inhibitors (Anastrozole, Exemestane, Letrozole). The goal of hormonal therapy is to reduce the chances of the breast cancer returning or progressing. However, looking into the quality of life and survivorship/thrivership, you should also be cognizant of the impact estrogen depletion has on overall health. These aromatase inhibitors can cause osteoporosis, increase cardiovascular events , and lead to diabetes [4] . It's easy to associate weight gain with being less active, one’s metabolism slowing down with age, or making poor dietary choices. Regardless, there seems to be a consensus that those diagnosed with breast cancer who utilize endocrine therapies tend to gain weight, even when they are exercising and making conscious, healthy nutritional choices. How Does Letrozole Affect Lipid Metabolism? One factor that is seldom discussed (and more research is certainly warranted) is the role that Letrozole has on lipid metabolism. While some trials and research have investigated the impact aromatase inhibitors have on the lipid profile, conclusive results have been elusive [5] . What we do understand is that aromatase inhibitors can have an adverse effect on blood levels. For example, increasing total cholesterol, meaning LDL levels (the “bad” cholesterol) and HDL (the “good” cholesterol), can lead to increased risk of cardiovascular disease [6] . Additionally, the enzyme lipoprotein lipase (LPL), which is controlled by insulin, pulls fat out of the bloodstream and into the cell. If this enzyme is in a muscle cell, it will turn the fat into energy. When the enzyme is sitting in a fat cell, it will pull fat into the cell and make it fatter [7]. Estrogen suppresses LDL, and with lower levels of estrogen in the body, this could be a reason some women gain weight during menopause or as part of breast cancer treatment. How to Combat Weight Gain During Breast Cancer Treatment As noted, several factors affect weight gain while undergoing chemotherapy or hormonal therapies. Some of these biological side effects are out of one’s control. However, there are actions you can take to maintain a healthy weight, including diet and activity level. Below are some of our favorite recommendations: Choose foods that are unprocessed and nutrient-dense Eat a diet low in added sugar Limit (or avoid) alcohol Increase fruits, vegetables, and whole grains Find an enjoyable activity that enables you to move your body daily (walking, light weights, swimming, etc.) This list is not comprehensive and you can feel free to choose. It is important to start with realistic and achievable goals. We are in this for the long haul! Dietary Recommendations for Fighting Cancer Treatment-related Weight Gain Fruits and vegetables are known to contain phytochemicals packed with antioxidants and nutrients, meaning they are rich in vitamins and minerals relative to their caloric content. Consider some of the following options: Whole grains: unprocessed foods that are high in complex carbohydrates, fiber, and nutrients, such as wheat, rye, oats, rice, bulgur, and barley. Green leafy vegetables: include spinach, Swiss chard, beet greens, lettuce, and romaine. Cruciferous vegetables: include broccoli, turnips, brussels sprouts, cauliflower, bok choy, kale, and mustard greens. Umbelliferous vegetables: include celery, parsley, fennel, carrots, and parsnips. Solanaceous vegetables: nightshades like eggplant and tomatoes. Cucurbitaceous vegetables: gourd family, including squash, pumpkin, cucumbers, and watermelon. Understanding how your body responds to cancer treatment is complex. You have been through a lot! What worked for your body pre-cancer may no longer be suitable during treatment. If you are struggling with weight gain because of breast cancer treatment or hormonal therapies, speak to your oncologist about your concerns. Ask for a referral to a nutritionist. Get confirmation on what an ideal exercise plan should look like for you! Cancer takes a toll on everyone, but continue to love yourself and your body; nurture it with compassion, movement, and wholesome food, and it will love you back in spades. References [1] Raghavendra, A., Sinha, A. K., Valle-Goffin, J., Shen, Y., Tripathy, D., & Barcenas, C. H. (2018). Determinants of Weight Gain During Adjuvant Endocrine Therapy and Association of Such Weight Gain With Recurrence in Long-term Breast Cancer Survivors. Clinical breast cancer , 18 (1), e7–e13. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.clbc.2017.11.006 [2] Gu, K., Chen, X., Zheng, Y., Chen, Z., Zheng, W., Lu, W., & Shu, X. O. (2010). Weight change patterns among breast cancer survivors: results from the Shanghai breast cancer survival study. Cancer causes & control : CCC , 21 (4), 621–629. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10552-009-9491-z [3] Lauby-Secretan, B., Scoccianti, C., Loomis, D., Grosse, Y., Bianchini, F., Straif, K., & International Agency for Research on Cancer Handbook Working Group (2016). Body Fatness and Cancer--Viewpoint of the IARC Working Group. The New England journal of medicine , 375 (8), 794–798. https://doi.org/10.1056/NEJMsr1606602 [4] Buch, K., Gunmalm, V., Andersson, M., Schwarz, P., & Brøns, C. (2019). Effect of chemotherapy and aromatase inhibitors in the adjuvant treatment of breast cancer on glucose and insulin metabolism-A systematic review. Cancer medicine , 8 (1), 238–245. https://doi.org/10.1002/cam4.1911 [5] Boutas, I., Pergialiotis, V., Salakos, N., Agrogiannis, G., Konstantopoulos, P., Korou, L. M., Kalampokas, T., Gregoriou, O., Creatsas, G., & Perrea, D. (2015). The impact of Anastrazole and Letrozole on the metabolic profile in an experimental animal model. Scientific reports , 5 , 17493. https://doi.org/10.1038/srep17493 [6] Zidan, J., Chetver, L., Hussein, O., & Zucker, M. (2010). Effect of letrozole on plasma lipids, triglycerides, and estradiol in postmenopausal women with metastatic breast cancer. The oncologist , 15 (11), 1159–1163. https://doi.org/10.1634/theoncologist.2009-0222

By Libby Riley On July 16, 2020, I received a phone call at 8:04pm that would change our lives forever. The phone call was from the Breast Center, with the results of the biopsies done two days prior, after my annual mammogram showed two suspicious masses in my right breast. I have said multiple times over the past 18 months that I NEVER ever thought I would be diagnosed with breast cancer in a million years. But, since then, I have learned that you can never say never. In the past year and a half, I have had 55 appointments with at least ten different doctors, 18+ scans, tests, or biopsy procedures, and 4 MAJOR surgeries. As a result, I have lost every organ that made me female and have had to cope with the grief that has come with those losses. In addition, I am on six different prescription medications and multiple over-the-counter medications to counteract the side effects from the prescribed meds. I am NOT the same person I was on July 16, 2020, and I never will be. Cancer has forever changed me; in some ways, it has been a positive for me, but in other ways, a negative. A cancer diagnosis tends to bring your life into perspective and cause you to separate the IMPORTANT from the TRIVIAL . It has forced me to face my mortality and to be hyper-vigilant about my health AND my husband & boys’ health as well. There have been many times that I sit at night in our family room watching TV with my husband and wonder if I need to start writing things down for him & the boys, just in case. YES, it does cross my mind. Statements that I usually prefaced with “if I ever get hit by a bus…” now get prefaced in the back of my head with “if I die from breast cancer.” I have never had a medical directive until my mastectomy surgery. Now I do. It is on file with the hospital, a copy lives in our safe, and a copy with my sister in New Jersey. Again, just in case. I have worked hard to refocus my anxiety and fear of recurrence. Cancer survivors have told me that those feelings lessen over time, but people say that about death, too; so, I’m not sure if it’s true or not. I have met many amazing women through the breast cancer community in the past year and a half and draw strength from their stories of survival, resilience, and hope . I TRY my best to live a hopeful life and not let the little “what ifs” that live in the corner of my mind come out too often. I look for the silver linings when I can. Whether by paying it forward to other breast cancer warriors or making a connection with another woman in a different part of the country, all because we both have a similar diagnosis and treatment path. I tend to appreciate the little things more - a pink sunset, my husband wearing a “Hope is Stronger than Fear” bracelet 24×7, my boys wearing pink ribbon socks, or a beautiful pink hydrangea blooming in our yard for the first time. I focus on my gratitude and being kind to myself and remembering that cancer is not a one-and-done disease. It is a never-ending story and a part of my life forever. The day that changed my life was transformative. From it was born the NEXT me because I am not NEW, I am different both physically & emotionally, and I am forever changed. On 8/31/21, we not only celebrated our 19th wedding anniversary, but we also celebrated my 1-year “cancerversary” of being NED. It was a big deal. Some people may wonder why cancer survivors celebrate these dates. They are milestones on the path of our lives and dates that will always have meaning, whether they be good or bad. My husband and I celebrated the day by taking off work, having lunch together, and just spending time alone, but we also did what I promised myself I would do if I made it through my first year as a cancer survivor – and that was by getting a new and very special tattoo. Through my plastic surgeon, we got the name of a medical tattoo artist who does traditional tattoo work and mastectomy tattoos. I did not do a mastectomy tattoo because I was still not finished with my reconstruction. Kerry did a “Warrior” tattoo and a pink ribbon tattoo, and I was able to get to know her to also plan for future work. I haven’t had to go through as much as some women do regarding treatment; and I have always been open and willing to share my experience when it comes to my journey. Breast cancer forever changed me, and I feel driven to make a difference. Do I know what the future holds for me? No….do any of us? I am just grateful for each day that I am here and that I can wake up and enjoy another day. Connect with Libby on Instagram: @libbybelzriley @lovelizard1 Diagnosed at 51, Stage 1a ER+/PR-, HER2- IDC,DCIS & LCIS bilateral mastectomy w/ reconstruction Thank you for allowing us to share your story, Libby! SBC adores you! SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Our Podcast Online Support Groups Free, Weekly Events

By Mojgan Hadi Hello, my name is Mojgan Hadi, and this is my story. My Background l was born in 1969 to a middle class family in Tehran. When l was a ten years old child, the Iranian Revolution (also known as the Islamic revolution) began in 1979, and a year later in 1980, the lran and Iraq war started. ​ After eight years of fighting, I was married the day that “the end of war" was declared between Iran and Iraq in 1988. ​ At that time, I thought this day would be the best day of my life and that I would have a wonderful future ahead. ​ Within two years of being married, my son was born, and six months after that, I was pregnant with my daughter. While one of my greatest desires was to study and go to a university, I spent all my time to tending to my children. After a few years and because of a bad economic situation, I had to start working. I found work in a driving training center as a driving trainer. ​ This was a job with lots of stress and danger. When I was about forty years old, my father developed stomach cancer and passed away at sixty eight. l loved him and his death was very painful for me. ​ During this time, l still was working, doing the housework, and taking care of my family. Four years after my father's death, my thirty-eight year old brother was diagnosed blood cancer and this represented a disaster in my life. ​ For nine months, I went to the hospital to take care of my beloved brother, while still working at the driving school and managing the home and family. It was a horrible time. Unfortunately, my dear brother who was a compassionate and kind man passed away. ​ Then, life became meaningless. My Breast Cancer Story The main story happened two years after my brother’s death. Iranian people celebrate the new year in April. It was on that night (April, 2015) when I went to take a shower, and I accidentally found out a small tumor in my right breast! ​ The next day, I consulted with a doctor. At first, I did a sonogram (ultrasound) and then a mammogram, and then I found out the results. I was in shock and the world became dark to me. ​ I hadn't enough time to understand the problem exactly when I found myself in a surgery room! Immediately after the painful operation, I began the journey of chemotherapy, radiotherapy, and injections of Herceptin . When I was going to the clinic for treatment, I observed young women and even some girls who were unmarried and diagnosed with cancer. Listening to some of the patients' stories was more painful than my own sickness. Some of their husbands had left them and had even taken their children with them.​ Some of people had no health insurance and sometimes they had to forego treatment. Sometimes because the medicine's price was too expensive and they couldn't afford it and sometimes because of the sanctions that were put upon our country, we couldn't receive the drugs in a timely manor, or even at all. Some people were obliged to sell their homes and borrow the money with high prices of interest. It was misery! After Treatment After finishing my treatment, I started thinking about and reflecting upon my life. I realized that with these things that were happening to me, and especially the way that I was confronting them, catching cancer was predictable; in short, I was putting a lot of pressure on myself and my lifestyle was really wrong. ​ l decided to change my life deeply and save myself! I started to study and research about new ways of treatments. At first, I went on a vegetarian diet , and because of that, I lost a little weight and of course saved some money. Then, I went to yoga class for few months. Yoga positively affected me and gave me a much needed sense of calm. However, because of lymphedema in my right hand, I couldn't continue. Now that I was gaining more energy, I decided to learn English , which had been one of my desires for many years. Getting My Life Back I am interested in communicating with people in other countries, and I like to know about their culture and their spectacular places. ​ The best part was going to painting class . Playing with colors on canvas was amazing and was taking me to a colorful world. It was fantastic. ​ I started to travel in some beautiful places in Iran. ​ I love traveling- it is a little expensive, but wonderful. In doing these things, I came back to life, and it's a nice feeling. So What's Next I co-operate with an NGO about women's breast cancer in Iran, and I am curious to know about NGO's in others countries. I say proudly to all female patients that this sickness made a big, and positive change in my life, in my opinions, perspectives, and in my relationships with people. Now, I can solve problems and difficulties easier than before. I control my mind and try thinking positively. I don't let myself into a downward spiral of sadness. All of these accomplishments are because of my diagnosis with breast caner! ​ Thank you, cancer! Thank you for sharing your story, Mojgan. SBC loves you! SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Our Podcast Online Support Groups Free, Weekly Events

By Tammy How could this happen to me? I am a personal trainer, I try my best to eat healthy foods, I eat lots of fruits and vegetables, no fast food, I don’t drink (besides an occasional sip of my husbands red wine), don’t smoke, workout 6 days a week etc… I was devastated. The thought of the surgeries and putting poison into my body made me want to run away forever. Where to begin... The long story short is I had a routine mammogram January 2017. Months later, after many more images, tests, and two surgeries (one for breast removal and one for complete reconstruction), I found myself facing my greatest fear: Chemo. Not only would I have to complete 12 weeks of chemo, but because I am triple positive, I would need a year of immunotherapy every three weeks before the treatment year will be done. I’m thankful my tumors were small and my lymph nodes were clear but I had a long year ahead. I had to accept this and move on. I had many sleepless nights. I cried many tears. I knew I had to do this for my family and friends. I really didn’t want to. How could I make this all go away? I couldn’t. So I took action! I kept working out six days a week. Some days this meant only walking or very light weights. I kept moving , and I believe this helped me recover very quickly from my surgeries and chemo. Believe me, I had days where all I could do was sit on the couch because the nausea was so extreme. I cried because I felt everyone else was living their lives and I was only watching but not living at all, I was only barely existing. The day I shaved my head was difficult. But the day I lost my eyelashes and eyebrows I went into an extreme depression. I no longer looked or felt like me. I couldn’t even recognize the person in the mirror. She was so unrecognizable and literally stayed indoors for weeks. While going through treatment, I went every three weeks for Herceptin and finished in July of 2018. My hair is slowly growing back. It was very uncomfortable to wear a wig, so I try and not stay out for too long. I was working very part-time but had to put most of my life on hold. I don’t know if I will ever feel like my old self again. Sometimes I forget, but then I see myself in the mirror and it all comes back. My body will never really look the same, but that’s ok. I have a strong faith in God, and I know He will guide me through whatever happens. I can’t wait for the day when this is all over, when I have hair again, and then, I will feel truly like I can put this behind me... Except for the fact that a reoccurrence will always be in the back of my mind. Where am I now? It’s been over a year since I completed chemo and 6 months since I completed Herceptin. I’m feeling better every day! I’m slowly getting stronger and even a little less tired! There is hope and life does go on!! My hair came back and I'm ready to celebrate life! Thank you for sharing your story, Tammy. SBC loves you! SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Positive Thinking for Healing Online Support Groups

Meet Krystle, Diagnosed At 27 And The True Definition Of Strength At the start of the summer in 2016, I was in the “prime” of my life. I had a prestigious research fellowship working on an HIV vaccination project at Tulane University, I was entering my last semester of graduate school, and I spent my weekends strolling down the lively streets of New Orleans. Everything was perfect, or so it seemed. Little did I know that a storm was coming. Within a few weeks, everything would change. Forever. Diagnosis And Holding On On July 15, 2016, while sitting on the same bed where I had spent countless hours studying some of the world’s deadliest diseases, I received a phone call that would throw my whole world into disarray. That day, at the ripe age of 27, I was diagnosed breast cancer. One of my very first phone calls was to my then-boyfriend. We had been together for a year, spent holidays together, and even discussed what we would name our future children. I imagined that he was going to be my primary support system- compassionate, understanding, and an impenetrable presence. A minute into the phone conversation, he hung up on me, frustrated at the notion that I might not come home to North Carolina to be treated. That should have been my first red flag, but I had seen The Fault in Our Stars , and I knew we would be okay. He even promised that he would never leave me. That means something, right? Unfortunately, this isn’t Hollywood, and I wasn’t Hazel Lancaster. Our relationship started to spiral downward, and very quickly. In fact, deep, down inside I knew as soon as a month after my diagnosis that “forever” wasn’t going to happen, but I still held on. Even after he laughed at me and called me pathetic when I had trouble getting into the car a week after my 10-hour mastectomy surgery with drains distending from my sides, I held on. Even after our fight because I had to shave my head when my hair wouldn’t stop falling out, I held on. Even after sitting through a 5-hour chemo, crying, because a fight had gotten so bad that he shoved me into the car door, 10 minutes prior to walking through the cancer hospital door, I held on. Even after he told me he would rather not spend New Years with me because I wouldn’t be any fun due to a chemo infusion I had a few days before, I held on. In retrospect, in the beginning, I do think he cared. However, ultimately, it was too overwhelming for him. Worth More Cancer is messy. It’s dark and scary. It forces you to face your own mortality. Want to know a secret? It’s like that for you AND the people around you. It is, indeed, something that not everyone can handle and you know what? That’s okay. However, over the past two years, I’ve learned that I would rather surround myself with people who CAN handle it. I would rather be with a man who understands that I’m worth more than a phone call, two days before a surgery, telling me that he no longer wanted to be in a serious relationship because the past 6 months had been too hard on him, and that he was too young to be going through such a trying ordeal. ​I WAS worth more than that and just to be clear; YOU are worth more than that. You are worth someone who will lie on the bathroom floor with you when the chemo starts to kick in, but your nausea medications don’t. You are worth someone who will parade you around a college basketball game with your bald head like a full moon shining. You are worth someone who brings you your favorite snacks during chemo, even if you end up hating them after (it’s the thought that counts). You are worth someone who tells you they will not leave you, and means it. The situation with my ex devastated me. It broke me into a million little pieces. In fact, it thrusted me into a dark depression; one I thought I’d never get out of. But you know what? Two years later, I’m still here. Thanks to people who didn’t give up on me, and still don’t. Thanks to friends who broke into my apartment when I was so sedated on Oxy and couldn’t get off the couch, much less communicate with anyone for 24 hours. Thanks to my family and closest friends who WILL sit on the bathroom floor with me when I think I’m dying. And last, but definitely not least, to a newfound faith in God and the blessing that He bestowed upon me when He removed my ex from my life. I still have “those” days; those days when I wallow in self-pity, but at the end of the day, I know a brand new one is coming. So, I pick myself off the floor, straighten my crown, and keep it moving. The Latest Here is the latest after my appointment with my oncologist today: As I’ve previously mentioned, neither one of my oncologists want me to carry a baby due to several factors including my hormone status and BRCA mutation. My BRCA mutation not only gave me a higher chance of breast cancer, but also, a much higher chance of ovarian cancer (mine is 40%, the normal population is around 1%). Ovary removal is recommended for BRCA+ mutants. After careful consideration, I’m contemplating getting mine out sooner rather than later. Sooner being May of this year. If I decide to do this, I will be giving up the chance to ever conceive naturally. I’m asking that you all please pray for guidance because this is a huge decision and one that would change my life, forever. It's May It's May, and a decision has to be made. This decision WILL change my life, forever. It’s not one I’ve made lightly; in fact, it’s been months of me going back and forth. On April 17th, I underwent a salpingo-oophorectomy, which is the removal of both ovaries and fallopian tubes. I know the risks of going into early menopause. I know the price I’m paying by doing this. I know what I’m giving up. But I also know the huge risks of me continuing to be noncompliant with my medications, and that risk could possibly mean my life. Honestly, and respectfully, I don’t need opinions or medical advice; I’ve already talked to many doctors, healthcare professionals, and other young women who have been through this. I need your prayers. Prayers for comfort, prayers to watch over the doctors who will be performing the procedure, and prayers for a speedy recovery, both physically and emotionally. I’ve been led through the fire before, and there’s no doubt in my mind that He won’t lead me through this, too. Thank you for sharing your hope and resilience, Krystle. We love you. SurvivingBreastCancer.org Support: Online Support Groups Breast Cancer Book Club

By Tracee Cole In January of 2020, I went to the doctor, for him to diagnose me with shingles. While I was there, I mentioned a lump I had felt in my breast and armpit and how painful they felt. He said it’s probably from the shingles . He scheduled me for a mammogram and an ultra sound a few weeks later after my shingles calmed down. When I had the imaging, the doctor came in and said he wanted to do a biopsy because some of the cells looked suspicious or abnormal. I came back in a couple days for the biopsies, and they said I would know in a few days. I got a call the next day saying I needed to come in right away. I immediately called my husband, said we needed to go in, and that I didn’t think it was good news. My heart just sank to the floor and I couldn’t stop shaking. I found out I had breast cancer and that it was in my a lymph node. I was diagnosed with IDC and DCIS grade 2 triple positive in February 2020. Being triple positive, I had to start with chemo right away. Things moved so fast once I found out, it was hard for the diagnosis to even really sink in. Before chemo started, I had genetic testing, a CAT scan, port placement surgery, an echo of my heart, bone scan, x-ray, more mammograms, and a breast MRI, along with surgeon and plastic surgeon appointments. Finally, I started chemo. I had my mom and husband with me at my first one. Then COVID hit, and I couldn’t have anyone with me for the rest of my treatments. I had a total of 6, every 3 weeks. It was like being on a roller coaster. I felt good, then horrible, and then I started to feel better and it started all over again. Then I had a bilateral mastectomy with expanders in July. I became cancer free. Because I had lymph node involvement, I needed to have 25 rounds of radiation. At 15 rounds in, I came down with an infection and ended up in the hospital with 4 surgeries in 5 days and lost my expander on the side that was being radiated. I wasn’t able to get an expander put back in because of the type of infection I had, so my surgeon put an antibiotic spacer in to be able to stretch my skin a little bit and to heal the infection. I healed for a couple of weeks and then continued my radiation. In February 2021, I finished my Herceptin and Perjeta , and now I’m on Anastrozole for the next 5 years (because my cancer was hormone driven ). My exchange surgery was May 7th, but the day before my surgery my plastic surgeon said she wasn’t comfortable doing that. Because my skin had tightened so much from February at my consult appointment, she didn’t feel comfortable putting an implant or expander in. She suggested doing a Latissimus Dorsi Flap surgery with an expander. This is basically taking my back muscle or part of the muscle and transferring it to under the breast, where the tightened radiated skin would be removed. I decided to try this surgery. I did have this surgery on May 7th and the plan is to have my exchange surgery along with fat grafting the end of July. I am still at higher risk to lose the expander or implant. I’m just staying positive and praying I don’t have any more issues. I am researching potentially going flat , if this doesn’t work. But for now, I’m healing again until the next surgery. Thank you for hearing my story. ️ Thank you for sharing your story, Tracee. SBC loves you! SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Online Support Groups Attend an Event Listen to the Podcast: Breast Cancer Conversations

By Tara Coyote My life has been a jagged, windy road and I’m grateful for every growth opportunity that comes my way. Five years ago, my best friend of 19 years died from Leukemia. I was honored to be one of her main caretakers for 22 months from diagnosis to death. Her death helped bring a valuable awareness of my own mortality. One year after she died, I was diagnosed with Stage 3 Breast Cancer. For 2.5 years I chose an exclusively natural non-toxic approach to healing. During this time, I ran a horse retreat center where people could spend healing time with horses. A very unfortunate event occurred, which forced me to sell my business, horses, and retreat center. Due to the immense stress, the cancer progressed to be Stage 4 in multiple areas in my body. After this life-changing event, I decided to move back home to my ancestral home of Kauai, Hawaii with the intention to heal. In the winter of 2019, I had cancer in my breast, lungs, liver, spine, adrenal glands, and left hip. I was referred to Hospice. I was petrified. As my body declined, I had to take a hard look at my belief system and whether or not to stay committed to healing naturally. Was I going to die for my stubborn choice of not doing chemotherapy or was I brave enough to do the thing I feared the most, which was chemotherapy? After my best friend’s death, I had an extreme amount of trauma to process, which fueled my fear of doing chemotherapy. I chose life! The mind is meant to be questioned and belief systems can be changed. I ended up doing nine months of chemotherapy. In that time, I ended up breaking my hip and having to have double hip surgery due to bone metastasis. In February 2020, I finished treatment with remarkable results! Since then, I continue to have the blood tests of a healthy, normal person. My CT scans continue to have miraculous results and the cancer continues to shrink! I am very aware how fragile life is. Living with a life-threatening diagnosis has been challenging, but I have learned the most valuable gift. I now know that every moment I’m alive is precious. I’m truly appreciative of my beautiful body, spirit, heart, and soul. It’s usually the most difficult moments that grow us and stretch us to new levels of awareness. Diamonds are birthed under pressure . I know that as deeply as I’m challenged, I will in turn be gifted with incredibly valuable insights. I choose to be grateful and enjoy every moment that I can! I wrote an Amazon bestseller titled, ‘Grace, Grit & Gratitude: A Cancer Thriver’s Journey from Hospice to Full Recovery with the Healing Power of Horses’ where I share my story. You can find it at: https://amzn.to/3lEJua3 Connect with Tara on Instagram and Twitter: @taracoyote Thank you for allowing us to share your story, Tara! SBC loves you! SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Our Podcast Online Support Groups Free, Weekly Events

By Elisabeth Perucca I was diagnosed with breast cancer for the first time in 2004, when I was 42. I lived in my home city, Paris, France. I had put an end to a 10-year relationship and was working as a writer in corporate communications for 20 years. My mom had had breast cancer at the age of 51—which was cured with surgery and radiation—so I had started doing yearly mammograms. It was during a yearly exam that my tumor was detected. The surgery report said: SBR III ( Scarff-Bloom-Richardson , grade III), estrogen receptor +, HER2 1+, no cancer in lymph nodes. By the time I was diagnosed, I had spent my life doing a lot to be loved, and was constantly looking for the love and approval of others. I had also done a great deal of personal development and greatly benefited from psychotherapy (and other healing modalities) to heal. Honestly, I thought I was protected from this kind of disease. So when I heard the word “cancer,” I was shocked. The treatment started with a tumorectomy which was followed with 6 cycles of chemo (4.5 months), radiotherapy, and hormone therapy Tamoxifene; Aromasine 2007; Arimidex 2008-2010. Immediately after surgery, I felt hopeless and exhausted. To help me out of that dark space, a friend dragged me to a semi-private yoga class at the home studio of Aline Frati, a yoga teacher of 30+ years in Paris. My friend and I were the only two students. It was my first time doing yoga. And in that hour and a half, I went through a complete transformation. Incredible Intuition Aline had an incredible intuition about her. S he had the ability to sense the students in her class . And she was able to deliver exactly what each person needed, at exactly the right moment. “The yoga I teach helps a person become aware of repetitive patterns of anxiety and fear that come from early childhood, and free that energy up so it’s reintegrated in the body’s global energy,” she once explained to me. She was and still is my yoga teacher, although she passed away in 2018. Aline’s yoga practice complemented the work I was doing in therapy. With yoga, I connected deeply with my body, I inhabited it. In therapy, I named my emotions and insights—some of them came up during the yoga practice. Becoming a Yoga Teacher After my treatments, Aline saw the yoga teacher in me: “you need to teach!” I had always wanted to be a dancer. I knew Aline was right, I knew that it was my calling to teach yoga- to share with others the type of healing and transformation that I had experienced. And I was going to do everything I could to become a yoga teacher. In 2006, love made me do the big leap from Paris to Atlanta, GA. My husband was American and lived in Atlanta (he still does). Once in Atlanta, I worked as a freelance writer for corporate communications and, three years later, I started a 200-hour yoga teacher training. It was the first time I had ever stepped foot into an actual yoga studio. But soon after, I began the training process I realized that something was amiss. This yoga felt drastically different from what Aline had introduced me to during that vulnerable period of my life. Sure, there were other types of yoga that were more gentle and restorative, but they still didn’t quite unite my spirit with my body and mind in the manner that I was seeking. Staying True to Myself After my yoga teacher training, I started doubting. Should I teach a more “physical” yoga or restorative yoga to conform to what seemed to be the American way? Neither of these routes spoke to me. With the encouragement of mentors, I decided to stay true to myself, and started teaching (part-time) my own style of yoga- the type that worked for me—“my yoga.” While I was still working as a corporate writer, I continued training in the healing arts. In 2010, I trained in gestalt therapy in Atlanta—an awareness practice that helps a person focus on the present moment and express their truth. This was a natural move since I wanted to give my yoga students an opportunity to speak their truth and I was familiar with therapy. In 2011, I landed in a therapeutic yoga teacher training program in Atlanta, geared entirely to help a person heal whether physically, emotionally or spiritually, and was certified in 2013. The program trained yoga teachers to teach yoga with the sole purpose to help a person heal using yoga techniques, in one-on-one private sessions or small group classes. This yoga therapy training felt closer to what I wanted to do as a healer than what I had learned during my yoga teacher training. However more than anything else, the yoga therapy certification gave me the permission to create my own yoga-based healing modality. 2014 was the year of the “nuclear explosion.” I realized that, once again, I put the needs of others before mine. I had helped my husband to fulfill his dream—to buy a house—which had nothing to do with my own—to be seen by the man I loved. We ended up with a house and unable to connect. I separated from my husband, I got sick with a second bout of cancer, and my dad was diagnosed with lung cancer, all at the same time. Just like the first time, the recurrence was diagnosed during my yearly mammogram. A Team to Help Me Through the Other Side I returned to France to regroup with my family and to rebuild myself. Just like for my first cancer, I put together a team to help me through the other side of the ordeal. The treatment included breast conservation surgery, I refused the mastectomy, 6 cycles of chemo (4.5 months), and hormonal therapy (Arimidex for 5 years). This time, cancer had spread to 2 lymph nodes. The breast conserving surgery went well, although, the situation turned tricky. Complications brought on an infection in the incision that simply would not heal. An infection. Chemo. Those things usually don’t go well together. I had no other choice than to start chemo and hope the infection healed. I managed to get rid of the infection at the end of chemo. What a relief for both my surgeon and I! Unfortunately, another tricky turn came up. We were in the middle of winter. The incision transformed into a wound which had to heal from the bottom up so that it didn’t get infected again. This meant I needed to go to a nurse, every single day, so that they cleaned the wound and changed the dressing, until the wound closed up. No one knew how long this would take. Two months later, the wound was still wide open. I visited my surgeon for one of those frequent check-ups. I felt so discouraged, I couldn’t hide it. “For the wound to heal, I need you to have faith,” said Dr Dulaurans, my surgeon. His words woke me up . They echoed what my friend and reflexologist, Rodrigue Vilmen, was telling me for months, “You’re emotionally torn and don’t want to let go of your marriage. The wound is the physical expression of this struggle. Have faith. The wound will heal in the spring when you will feel clarity again.” Six months later, the wound closed up. The experience taught me how the body and mind are inextricably connected together. What Are Your Dreams, Beliefs, and Values? Meanwhile, I began therapy again. I knocked on the door of Laurent Malterre, a French licensed psychologist, author, and teacher of clinical psychology whose practice is niched in one of the oldest streets of Paris. We had come into each other’s lives in 2003, while I was struggling in a toxic relationship. With his help, I got out of the relationship and found meaning in my first breast cancer. When I returned to see Laurent in 2014, he urged me to see my light, to recognize who I am, instead of looking for others to recognize me. “What are your dreams, beliefs and values? What makes your soul unique?” were questions he asked me. That’s when I came up with my own vision of yoga therapy: I wanted to offer a healing modality with both the yoga practice I had learned from Aline and a space for my clients to speak their truth. That’s what was in my heart and soul! That was my light. After a year in France, I returned to Atlanta in May 2015. In August, my father passed away. A year later, I divorced and I let go of my 25+ year job as a corporate journalist to be a full-time yoga therapist. I continued to work with Laurent Malterre, both as my therapist and my mentor in yoga therapy, from Atlanta. Laurent and I started having Skype sessions, every other week, where we shared questions, challenges, and results that my yoga therapy brought. How does yoga help a person melt their barriers down and, ultimately, share their true feelings? How does yoga help feel what there is to feel? What does a specific symptom, a tension say of a person, their story and healing path? What does naming our pain bring to the table? How far can I go as a yoga therapist in inviting a person to share what they really feel? How can yoga complement verbal therapy? Our collaboration still goes on today, and we’re crafting together what my yoga therapy practice is. I started to include circle work in my yoga therapy classes. Thriving After Illness In parallel, I designed a body-mind, yoga-based 3-day workshop for people struck by physical or emotional illness. The workshop, titled “Thriving After Illness,” invites participants to experience practices that they can do in conjunction with, or after medical treatment, to improve their general health and wellbeing, and reignite their life fire. Nutrition, self-awareness exercises, and yoga are the workshop’s pillars. Every idea, concept, and practice mentioned in this workshop is there for one single reason- I’ve personally used them on my own healing journey, they’ve worked for me, and in some instances, they’ve probably saved my life. The pandemic has brought me to adapt my 3-day workshop Thriving After Illness for a broader audience. My new workshop is a live, virtual 2-hour discussion where I share the ways I have found to manage stress and take my place in the world. I also ask questions. Sometimes, difficult questions. Necessary questions. Participants share, bond. “Very thought-provoking” is a feedback I often get. I hope that’s exactly what my discussion workshop is! In addition to my discussion workshop, I facilitate one-on-one yoga therapy sessions, a small weekly group class (4 participants maximum), and workshops. Each class includes a healing circle where participants are invited to share what is truly going on with them before and after the yoga practice. My intention is to help my clients know what they truly feel in their body and in their soul, where they stand in their lives, what their true needs are, to help them be authentic with themselves and the people around them. For me, it’s the only way to wellness, true wellness. Life After a Second Breast Cancer Recurrence How am I doing now after my second recurrence? I am finally seeing the beautiful soul that I am, shining my unique light, and building my kingdom. I am feeling more authentic to myself than I have ever before. I've had the courage and possibility to leave the relationships that didn't serve me anymore. I've found new friends. I'm creating, from absolute scratch, a healing model, in which I strongly believe. So, overall, I feel joyful. Does this mean life is easy for me? Hell no. Becoming a therapist is a huge journey. It's taken me a long time to name what I do and to name it to others. I'm getting there. My mom is across the pond, far away. Relationships? Well, they're hard. Still, I see my richness now. And that alone makes me want relationships that are more equitable. Am I afraid of cancer? Yes. It can be a deadly disease. That being said, cancer can also be transformed into a path of richness and hope. That's what I want to help people do with my yoga therapy practice and why it's my life work. Elisabeth-perucca.com Elisabeth’s blog Facebook Instagram LinkedIn Thank you for sharing your story, Elisabeth. SBC loves you! SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Our Podcast Online Support Groups Free, Weekly Events

By Adrea Carr I lost my mommy to breast cancer when I was 13. She was 47 years young when she died, just 5 days shy of her 48th birthday. Since the age of 26/27, I’ve gotten mammograms FAITHFULLY every year, knowing that early detection is key . In December 2020, I had an abnormal mammogram. I have the BEST primary care doctor here in South Florida where I live. She ordered me to get rechecked six months later, and in June, I did just that. The results were not what she wanted to see. After having a double biopsy done, the results came back, July 2021, Stage 1 breast cancer in my left breast . Hearing my specialist on the phone saying those words left a lump in my throat. I have a 26 year old daughter who is phenomenal, and I have been open and transparent as I can be with her from the time she was old enough to understand illnesses. Only a few people close to me knew what was going on. I knew if I were to beat this thing, I needed to stay positive and keep positive energy around me at all times . Testing after testing, and then a decision to make on how I wanted to attack this disease. I chose to have a bilateral mastectomy even though the cancer was in just one breast. I decided to also have breast reconstruction surgery with expanders then permanent implants . I had surgery September 21st and am currently going through the expansion process. I have a bit of a journey still to go with a few more procedures. I’ve decided to document and share my journey, there is so much more testimony to give as I journey through the healing process. I know there are others who would welcome the encouragement as I did from others who went through this as well. Mustering up the courage to speak about and share my journey has been liberating. I have an outstanding medical care team, which is important, but my support system of family and friends is what is carrying and sustaining me . From daily phone calls to check on me, to going to doctors visits with me, I am humbled by the pure selfless love. My story is different from so many others, yet we share one commonality as survivor. I want to share my story, I want to uplift and encourage, and I want to advocate in a way I can be impactful and make a difference. I’m still muddling through just how. Thanks for reading my story. Thank you for sharing your story, Adrea. SBC loves you! SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Our Podcast Online Support Groups Free, Weekly Events

By Stacy I remember the day I was diagnosed as if it was yesterday. The Diagnosis As a middle school teacher, I was down to my last day of my precious summer vacation, and had a long list of last-minute errands I wanted to complete that day before starting a new school year. Going to the doctor was an annoying inconvenience in my already busy day. My primary care doctor mainly wanted to go over a recent ultrasound that he had asked to have of my right breast after my recent mammogram came back abnormal. My doctor had said he was pretty sure it wasn’t anything to worry about, but since my mammogram did show something slightly suspicious, he wanted me to have the ultrasound scan just to be safe. At age 46, I have always been extremely healthy. I ate well, exercised, ...and didn’t give it a second thought. In fact, I had decided to go to the visit alone since I wasn’t the least bit worried. That’s the day (August 11, 2017), that life as I knew it would change….. During that visit, I found out that I had not one, but three highly suspicious spots in different quadrants of my right breast . I was in shock and just couldn’t believe what my doctor was saying to me. I told him that I would go for the biopsy, but I’m sure it was nothing. He then said: “Stacy, I’m not going to lie to you, but those spots have a BI-RADS score of a 5, which means that those spots are highly likely to be malignant. You will need to go for a biopsy today to confirm this diagnosis, but brace yourself , and be prepared for many upcoming appointments and major surgery.” I would not be able to have a lumpectomy like many other women because the spots were in different areas of the breast. I would also need an MRI to see if the cancer had spread. Advice That I Will Never Forget He then gave me a valuable piece of advice that I never forgot through the struggle that I was about to endure. He said: “I know this will be hard, but I want you to try to live your life in a regular way (as best that you can) as you fight this battle. It will be hard, but don’t let it become all-consuming. Keep working every day and doing your thing….meet up with friends, spend time with family, and go on trips, no matter how hard that may seem.” My Experiences After my biopsy, it was confirmed that I had invasive ductal carcinoma . All that I could think is, please let me live so that I can see my 2 kids (although they are young adults) graduate college, get married, have kids, and accomplish their dreams. So, now here I am writing this 15 months later, and life is good! I have had three surgeries this past year. After being put on Tamoxifen , which is suppose to help keep my hormone-positive cancer at bay, I had too many side effects and am now on a different medication called Anastrozole and I’m feeling so much better! I still go to frequent follow-up appointments with my oncologist and plastic surgeon every three months, and I even got a tattoo that says, “Seize the day,” as a personal reminder to live my best life! I know that I am one of the really lucky ones. When I had my mastectomy , I was told that it was early stage 1, hormone positive cancer, and that it had not spread to my lymph nodes. I also found out that I was BRCA negative. More great news followed from my oncologist that I would not need to have chemotherapy...those words were music to my ears! They say that you are only as strong as those that you surround yourself with , and I truly had an amazing team of doctors, an amazing husband, and a supportive family and friends that were there every step of the way. Sharing My Story As I fought breast cancer, I chose to share my story (as uncomfortable and private as it was) with all my friends and family on Facebook. I persuaded them to be proactive about getting those mammograms on a regular basis ( especially my teacher friends who tend to overlook self-care because they are too busy !) I shared with them that I had never had a lump or any type of sign that I had breast cancer, and had I not had that mammogram when I did, the cancer might have spread and I would have needed chemo. Many of my friends sent me private messages telling me that because of me they went and had that dreaded mammogram. It was that defining moment that I realized that when I felt up to it, I wanted to help others that were going through breast cancer! Sharing my story on social media helped me to not only heal, but may have helped others in the process. Keep Doing Your Thing To anyone reading this that is going through breast cancer , just know that it is okay to have days when you feel depressed and worry if you will survive. Allow yourself to have those brief moments, but then brush yourself off, keep doing your thing, and be the fierce survivor that you are. Then, when you are done fighting the fight, and the sunshine comes through the clouds again, go out there and do something worthwhile with all that you have learned during your journey and help others who are currently fighting breast cancer…. after all, isn’t that really what life is about anyway? Thank you for sharing your story, Stacy. SBC supports you! SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Positive Thinking for Healing Online Support Groups

By Zoe My name is Daniela alias Zoe, I’m 33 years old , going for 34. I have been living and working in NY for the past 6 to 7 years. In NY, I'm able to do way much more that I could ever do in my hometown in Italy. NY is a place I consider my artistic home. I can live and work in the U.S. on a 3 year artist visa. In fact, as of now, I'm busy renewing before it expires again. On July 29th 2014, I flew from JFK airport, NY to Fiumicino Rome. As usual, during the summer I go back to Italy on vacation, with the plan to come back to the States after 20 days, tops. Not having medical insurance in the U.S., it is in Italy that I do my usual medical annual check up at my breast and ovaries. There is some breast cancer history in my family but only from my father’s side, which would have been considered not really relevant. Moreover, back in 2003 , a suspicious nodule was found and I had to keep it under control by monitoring it. That year, I felt like a suspicious little ball growing on the right side of my breast. When I was raising my right arm it was popping up, stretching the skin and lightly altering the line of the breast. I was a worried. My latest medical check up didn't reveal anything alarming. How can something drastic happen in a year? My Diagnosis On August 21st 2014 , I was diagnosed a G3 Breast cancer at my right breast, infiltrating ductal carcinoma poorly differentiated ; this is the exact diagnosis. It seemed like the title of a movie or of a comic book from another dimension, from another time frame where all the serial numbers G3 of cyborg prototypes will have to be demolished by the corrupted military government cause inadequate, wrong and imperfect. Just like a Manga vision. Bottom line, I was dealing with a 2 centimeter and 7 millimeter neoplasia, chances are malignant cancer/ tumor. Could it be true? Fine needle aspiration biopsy , technically answered this question and confirmed the diagnosis. The doctors clearly told me that to allow the removal of the neoplasia, I would have to soon have a quadrantectomy surgery done, which is a cut that goes perpendicularly from the nipple to under the armpit. They also recommended possible post surgery radiotherapy sessions. These radiations are really harmful, among the many things they even have the power to change the DNA of the skin. I was stunned, yet forced to have to understand all of it and quickly learn how to find my way out of this nightmare which was just at its very genesis. Tests, Tests, Tests Before anything, I had to do a NMR (nuclear magnetic resonance) , a test that along a total body C.T. scan , would reveal possible presence of other neoplasia or metastasis. They still had to collect data on my case and they were not able to confirm that or anything with specific certainty, but some doctors already told me about the possibility of undergoing chemotherapy. Luckily, the C.T. scan didn’t reveal any metastasis but only an angioma on the liver, which initially scared the doctors, but later I learned it was congenital and therefore harmless. The NMR revealed two more neoplasia of small size. I was told they would have to take out all the mammary gland and mastectomy was the only possible solution. They would completely remove my right breast. Some lymph nodes would also have to be extracted from the armpit to see if the cancer had spread outside my breast. As if the removal of my breasts was not enough, I was told that 6 months of chemotherapy was also required. Whether this was going to happen before or after the surgery was not yet clear. A test that could allow the medical team to better understand when to do this treatment existed, but I was not aware of it at the time. Nobody had mentioned it. Thankfully the right oncologist informed me of it, which ultimately enlightened me on what to do. The existence of this important test was introduced to me only after being told all the possible consequences of the surgery. The gruesome list that attacked my womanhood was horrifying. I would be left unable to breastfeed, I would lose any sensibility, I would have to replace my mammary gland with implants. The possibility of removing my nipples was high and uncertain. It was only during the actual surgery that a test could have been performed to reveal whether tumor cells were present or not. I was doomed to have to enter the operating room without knowing if I would get out of it with nipples or not. That was a gamble I never imagined I would have ever had to experience in my life. Genetic Testing This last step might be the most important one for me. It consisted of a blood test that would inform me if the tumor was due to a genetic predisposition. If the test came positive there was a high risk of developing a tumor on both breasts, which meant that the removal of both breasts would have been likely. While waiting for the result of that test, I was left confronting the chance of a double mastectomy. As if that was not enough to fear, the doctors also informed me that if the test came back positive then in the near future, right after a potential delivery of a child, I should also have my ovaries removed. Really? Well, thanks for nothing. Fear, Panic, and Struggle The genetic test came back positive. Procedure and protocol became some of the terms my brain would have to get familiar with, as I had no chance but to accept 6 months of enduring chemotherapy and a double mastectomy: 9 months of my upcoming struggle. To console me, everybody kept saying: “Angelina Jolie did that too.” The Therapy September 18th 2014 was the day before I started the first cycle of chemotherapy. That day, a series of intramuscular injections to stop my ovaries from working and would force my body into a menopause. They inserted a PICC line in my left arm- an intravenous catheter where they would infuse the powerful chemotherapy medication and keep my veins safe. To shower, I would have to wrap that part of my arm with cellophane and tape it very securely. This lasted for 2 months. That first morning brought me a panic attack. I had many thoughts and I could not even keep up with all of them. I was sure I would have soon turned into some sort of an avatar. I would be left hairless just as a cyborg. In my creative mind, I imagined being forced in a military-like therapy of 3-4 hours of IV, and it would all be set up by fears and phobias dates and days. Days which would have only brought nothing but horror- one I would have no choice but face and confront. These injected medicines were considered smart bombs, but weren't that smart after all. They were just as smart as they could get. Chemotherapy kills the bad cells, but also kills everything else including the white blood cells that support the natural immune system, so I had weekly blood tests to monitor how my body reacted to the chemotherapy. While undergoing treatment, it was challenging to hear stories from other people. I didn’t necessarily want to hear people’s opinions. One specialist doctor provided a different perspective and information that I was forced to hear while I was in the waiting room. My own internet search even further fed the overall confusion. Reading about doctors' implications in regards to the mechanics of the human body often felt shady, murky, unclear, and untrustworthy. Wanting To Know More The stigma of Cancer still exists, supported by the thousands of taboos that surround it. I asked tons of questions to those doctors who so arrogantly seemed like carrying the knowledge of where the Holy Grail might be located. If you are not a doctor, if you are simply an ordinary human being, then how can you know or understand anything?! I grew up with a particular hate for uniforms, or any authority that pontificates absolute truths, especially when such truth implies no way out. Only death is not irreversible. I had questions! I wanted information. As an oncological patient, I felt merely allowed to be given the bare amount of knowledge. I felt like going back to being a child asking the many whys. My personal confusion came with these unanswered questions: How can I not have customized therapy? How is it possible that all these procedures are standardized and impossible to change? Why can’t I fully inform myself? How can I change this dogmatic approach? Am I a fool and a dreamer to even raise these questions? I had a hard time trusting anyone. As far as I was concerned, the conspiracy theories in my mind could have involved anyone. I never believed in pharmaceutical care alone, but rather, a holistic approach knowing that our state of mind, lifestyle, and habits, contribute to our health or sickness. Nowadays, in my opinion, eating organic food has become fashionable. We can take for granted that yoga, breathing, practicing sports, and especially being in touch with nature can help your health. It’s been since the 90’s that doctors talk about psychosomatic diseases, caused by stress: colitis, dermatitis, back pain, and so forth, to a point of actual traces of idiopathic diseases. However when you question that the mind can actually influence anything, it all becomes a new gray area that seems impossible for any, some doctors to even consider. Why? How can I suffer a psychosomatic symptom and not give my mind the same credit to do the very opposite? Body and mind are connected. I believe our minds can influence our body in both bad and good ways. Easterner philosophy and popular folk knowledge influences and supports this theory. Both for different cultural reasons even believe in the elevation of the spirit that can come through the pain, sacrifice, and penitence of such experience. My breast cancer diagnosis has allowed me to discover why I live - Why I die - Die? My intention wasn’t to die. I had never even considered dying. Double Mastectomy Luckily, early stage breast cancer is treatable, if not curable. For that I was grateful. I would not die. I had no choice but to trust what I was told. But I launched a search and collected all possible opinions to gather confidence to be doing the right thing. I called and sent emails to almost all of the best doctors in Italy. Everyone agreed: Double mastectomy was the way to go. Everybody kept saying: “Angelina Jolie did that too." My Hair Became Hats July 19th 2014, 7:30am, my first cycle of chemotherapy. 3-4 hours on a hospital bed with a series of IVs attached to the PICC line on my left arm. A nightmare with eyes wide open. I read, slept, and cried. Memories of the many movies about it kept rushing in my mind. Hell just began. I was only surrounded by women older than me. I was the junior in my nightmare. In my mind, the question was, “Why me?” and “When will I start feeling sick?” I knew well that within that same day that I would have started feeling the initial pain of the procedure. 6pm First Symptoms : Nausea Gagging without ever vomiting Headache General sickness and pain that exhausted my body in ways I never knew possible Bloated Anxiety and depression (of course) After The Therapy I alternated diarrhea with constipation. The list of symptoms is long. Here are a few: Fatigue, a burning sensation in the throat, and a lack of appetite. Chills and trembling. Hot flashes and heavy sweating every 10 minutes. A perennial chemical taste in my mouth. And I felt other things I cannot even fully describe or even knew were possible. I felt like a robot. Or maybe I wished I was a robot. I would have felt nothing if I were. I was still human. But often I was not sure what was left of me. During this time, I smoked weed and ate very healthy food. I followed the suggestions of a rather prestigious biologist and separated food from alkalizing and acidifying. No sugar, no dairy (I had already quit all of that a while ago anyway), no eggs, and no soy (contains hormones). No meat. I was also allowed only white meat but not too often. Small light blue fish was considered an even better choice, but again to be consumed rather rarely. I ate lots of cereals, seeds, sprouts, roots, and vegetables. I started meditation, and yes, I even embraced dancing again. On October 3rd , I turned 33 years old ... 2 days after my hair started falling out. This did not come as a surprise, of course. But being that in nature and for mere fashion, one of my favorite hobbies was dying my hair any possible color and since I even often shaved it by choice, I was sure that for someone like me losing it would have been the easiest part of this quest. It wasn’t. To prevent the shock of such an experience, I was advised to cut it short. I already sported a short hairdo, so I just left it alone. Unfortunately, I had to experience the horror of the first shower that left me with chunks of hair right in my hands. Each time I touched my head, my hair kept sticking to it. Each time I touched it, it horrified me. It fell out like an untangling sweater that ultimately becomes completely undone. In dismay I got out of the shower. I used my blow dryer to dry what was left of it. So much of it just blew off me. I felt like an animal in its first stage of being skinned. I had not yet accepted that the only thing for me to do was to completely shave my head. So as a solution, I just trimmed it all short. I bought hats and scarfs. But hair kept falling, all of it, including eyebrows and eyelashes. I found it everywhere. Even the shortest of my trimmed hair kept falling. It looked like a trace of me was being left behind me. I could no longer cope and completely shaved my head. When I weighed myself, I barely reached the 113 pound mark. I felt almost nil, but I kept fighting and fighting, and even when I thought I couldn’t, I did. When I couldn't fight for my own self, I fought for my mother who has always been there. Gifting me with the joy to live and relentlessly by my side all along. Motivating me to keep going. Right after the very first session, the tumor started regressing. The little ball was getting softer, thinning... and ultimately slowly disappeared. Great hope that everything will get better soon was finally plausible. Embracing My Life Again November 21st 2014 : After 4 cycles I was done with the hellish cycles. They removed the PICC line from my arm. But before doing that, I decided to indulge in an artsy nude photo shoot for my own self. I wanted to visually immortalize this moment as to respect my struggle and my relentless fight. To never forget this version of me I would never ever want to be again. I took 10 days away from it all and went to London and Berlin to try getting my mind off the whole ordeal. Once back home, I had to start a weekly therapy, but I was told it would be less aggressive. The therapy was indeed much kinder to my body, besides some fungus and pain on nails, there were less excruciating side effects, or maybe I had now gotten used to some of its discomfort. I did not dare to complain much and chose to look ahead instead. The end of the tunnel was visible at that point so I kept walking. Hair would grow back, but I felt much weaker than ever before. Christmas and New Years came and went. I finally could go back to doing yoga, because I no longer had a PICC line. I kept meditating and of course danced away as much as I could. I kept counting the weeks left until the surgery -8, -7... and so forth. I was aware that there was a chance for my white blood cells to freak out again and consequently be forced to skip some therapy cycles and slow down my way out of this tunnel. “I will not let this happen,” I told myself. Of course, I was left weak by this whole invasion of my body. I knew there was always the chance to postpone these cycles because of a cold or a flu or any other ordinary condition. I dread that chance and vowed I would not allow my body to delay nor extend this last part of this therapy. I wanted out. That was all there was in my head. I wanted out! I had to be back in NY and I had to embrace my life and creativity again. March 5th 2015 marked the end of the therapy. March 31st 2015 was surgery day: Double mastectomy. April 28th 2015 , finally back in Brooklyn, NY. Angelina Jolie was not there though! On October 26th 2021 , I had my Bilateral Salpingo-oophorectomy surgery in NYC. I have health insurance now; I got it during the pandemic. I’m in menopause, I’m on psychotherapy (it’s been 2 years), I’ve done ayahuasca twice, and I don’t take any medicine. Thank you for sharing your story, Zoe. SBC loves you! Connect with Zoe on Instagram: @zoemap SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Our Podcast Online Support Groups Free, Weekly Events

By Danielle Brandt I would never have thought that an active 33-year-old who was doing CrossFit 6 days a week , performed monthly breast exams , had no family history would be diagnosed with Stage 2 Breast Cancer . The day before I found my lump, I was snowshoeing in the Berkshires and loving life and just remember a constant irritation with my sports bra on my left breast and that was it. It wasn’t until we got home that Sunday night (Valentine’s Day) that I felt a hard small lump that was not palpable. After watching my mom fight colon cancer, my sisters and I have always taken our health very seriously and first thing Monday morning I called and got an appointment with my primary. My hospital is a teaching hospital and a resident examined me initially and asked the nurse practitioner to come in and share her thoughts. She didn’t like how it felt and knowing that I never had kids or had been pregnant concerned her more. She ordered a rush mammogram and ultrasound for that afternoon. As I was waiting in the waiting room for my mammogram , I just remembered looking around the room of women of all ages and wondering what their story was. The mammogram was painless and then it was time for my ultrasound . It felt like my heart was racing and about to jump out of my chest. I kept looking at the monitor trying to figure out if it was anything serious. The tech finished my scan and said the radiologist just needed to check as it was routine. It was not routine and again a medical student came first and scanned my chest again and spoke to the radiologist before she repeated the scan. It was at that moment she told me it was 90 percent likely cancer due to all the calcifications they were seeing . To say, I was a complete mess would be an understatement, but I knew after watching my mom go through cancer what I needed to ask for. Somehow, I found my voice and asked for a biopsy that day and explained that my grandmother had just passed the day before and that Wednesday I was leaving for New York for her funeral. That Wednesday was also the 7-year anniversary of my mom’s passing. The radiologist was amazing and asked people to stay late and perform my biopsy that day and I actually met my breast surgeon as well (at the time I didn’t know who she was as I was in complete shock). After meeting my breast surgeon, they put me in a room while I waited for my biopsy, and I called my husband and just broke down. Covid was still very active at this time, and they didn’t like visitors or spouses with you, but the nurse allowed my husband to meet me. As we were walking out of the hospital, the only thing I could say was “I don’t want to die.” I had always thought that if I got the big “C” I wouldn’t tell anyone right away and give myself time to process, but the issue with that is I am putting my family at risk. I decided on the way home to have my identical twin sister set-up a family zoom call and I told my sisters, my dad, my uncle, and my aunt. If I had tested positive for any of the gene mutations it would have meant that my twin sister had a 100 percent chance of getting cancer as well. By telling my family, it allowed my sisters to get checked along with my cousin. That Wednesday February 17th, my dad and little sister flew in, so we drove to my grandmother’s funeral together and it was also the day I got my biopsy results confirming it was cancer. My cancer is ER+, PR+, and Her2- with grade 3 cells and no genetic mutations. I met with my breast surgeon again in person and told her I wanted a double mastectomy ; it wasn’t even a thought for me. I just wanted my breast gone as they were trying to kill me. I really liked my breast surgeon and now it was the time to build the rest of my team. I met with an oncologist initially and didn’t really connect with her as I found her cold. Living in Boston gave me access to some of the top hospitals in the country and I got multiple second opinions to make sure I was happy with my game plan and team. It was at this point that I researched and asked for the Director of Oncology to be my oncologist and my plastic surgeon was chosen. It is so important that you feel comfortable with your team of doctors and their game plan. My plastic surgeon was diagnosed with Colon Cancer at the age of 38 and understood my fears which made me feel like I was being heard. My breast surgeon and plastic surgeon told it me that due to schedule issues I wouldn’t be able to get my double mastectomy for another month, but I just wanted my breast gone and for the next week I would call daily and speak to both of their admins and asked if there were any cancellations. It was a Friday, and I was on a work call when I received the call from my plastic surgeon admin that they had a cancellation for March 10th (the next Tuesday) and asked if that was too soon and I responded absolutely not! I immediately called my manager and HR department and told them that I would be going out on medical leave beginning that Tuesday. Again, due to Covid, my husband couldn’t be with me, and I had to face the biggest scariest surgery of my life all alone. I woke up on March 11th boobless and in tremendous pain ... not exactly how I thought I would be spending my 34th birthday. After my double mastectomy, my oncologist told me that my oncotype score was a 15 which usually doesn’t recommend chemo but due to my age and the grade of my cancer the cancer board felt like I should consider it . Again, I got multiple opinions from other oncologists, and all agreed that they would have a similar treatment plan. On April 10th, 2021, I got my port and would begin TC chemotherapy the next day. Prior to starting chemo, I did a lot of research and packed my chemo bag with ice gloves, ice booties, lemonheads, a blanket, and a giant water jug. Supposedly using ice gloves and booties would help prevent neuropathy and sucking on lemonheads would help with my taste buds. I also read that keeping active during chemo would help my recovery. During my 4 cycles of chemo, I stayed active and didn’t experience any major side effects. I was lucky and grateful to get through my surgery and chemo, but didn’t realize that after you are done with all of the above is when the fear really sets in. I was no longer going to the hospital every week and being seen; I was now just going once a month for my Zoladex shot and seeing my oncologist every 6 months. This is when my anxiety took over and I started worrying about a recurrence and having to take hormonal medicine really didn’t help either as I gained weight during chemo and now felt completely uncomfortable in my own skin. I am now a year and 8 months out from my double mastectomy, and I worry constantly about the cancer coming back, but I have also learned to appreciate life more. Every day, I get to see the sunrise and set is a good day for me and I have learned to prioritize myself more. I quit my job that had me working 60 plus hours a week and found a company who focused more on work life balance. I make it a point to workout or go for a walk every day and I am still learning how to deal with my anxiety and fear of a possible recurrence , but I am living and learning to take it one day at a time. -- Connect with Danielle on IG: @life_of_a_cancer_patient Thank you for sharing your story, Danielle. SBC loves you! SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Our Podcast Online Support Groups Free, Weekly Events

By Kiana Wooten In May 2019, I went to the doctor for a routine checkup. As the doctor was doing a normal breast exam, she felt a lump. I had felt this lump months before and paid no attention to it. Ever since I was a young teen, I had always felt small little lumps in my breasts, so to me it was normal. She proceeded to tell me that she wanted me to get a mammogram. I laughed because I thought, “What for?” At the time, I was only 34 years old and I know the typical age that a woman is supposed to start getting mammograms is around 40. I was not too concerned with it, so I just took the script and brushed it off. Fast forward to 3 months later, I started to have a lot of pain in my left arm and chest area. I was rubbing on my chest area and I noticed that the lump was still there, and it seemed bigger and a bit tender, which was a symptom I had not had before. It had not bothered me all these months, but now it was. I called my doctor and they urged me to go and get the mammogram as they had asked me to do before. Still, I did not think much of it. In my head, I honestly thought it could be a cyst. I finally got an appointment to get the mammogram done about a week later. While sitting in the radiology dressing room, a feeling of panic came over me. What if it was something to be concerned with? What was I going to do? Once they took me back to the room for the actual mammogram, I got nervous. The test took about 15 minutes. After the test was done, they bought me into a room. The technician informed me that they needed to do an ultrasound as well. Since this was my first mammogram, I thought that maybe this was a normal process after having a mammogram. Once she finished, she told me to get dressed and the doctor would be in to talk to me shortly. Well, that was different and unexpected. I have had tests done there before, and never has a doctor came in to talk to after. As soon as the doctor came in, my heart felt like it sank into my stomach. I just really started to feel sick. He looked at the images for a minute and said to me, “By the characteristics of the images, I am about 95% sure that you have some form of cancer…” I felt numb. I could not process what he was saying to me, so I sat there in silence for about a minute. For them to know exactly what it was, they needed to do a biopsy. So, I scheduled to have a biopsy done for 2 weeks later. The process did not hurt. I was more anxious to find out the results. On October 1, 2019, I received the phone call that would change my life forever. It was the doctor who performed the biopsy. As soon as she said the words, “I am sorry…” I knew something was wrong. She informed me of my diagnosis. I had something called Invasive Ductal Carcinoma , meaning the cancer was growing at a fast pace and I needed to seek treatment immediately. The following week, I saw a surgical oncologist. She assured me everything would be okay and what my options were. Before she could say anything, I said, “Take them both off.” Over the course of the next few weeks, I had appointments with her as well as a plastic surgeon. They kept asking if I was sure I wanted to remove both breasts (bilateral mastectomy). My answer never changed. On November 11, 2019, I had my initial surgery. In addition to having the bilateral mastectomy, I had tissue expanders put in to stretch the skin for when it was time for me to get my implants. Everything seemed like it went well until a few weeks after the surgery. I started not to feel well and developed a fever. My right breast area was sore and swollen. I went to the hospital, and it was discovered that I had an infection as well as a seroma (fluid buildup). This happened 5 more times over next 3 months. During this time, we were in the mists of the coronavirus pandemic, so it was super scary! Being hospitalized each time and having to put drains in on my sides to drain the fluid! NOT FUN! The last time it happened, my tissue expander tore through my muscle and skin, and I had to have emergency surgery to have them removed. On April 28, 2020, I had my tissue expanders taken out and they put my implants in. Everything seemed okay with the implants for about 4 months. On August 10, 2020, while at work, I started not to feel well and was in a lot of pain. Later that night, I developed a fever, so I knew that was not a good sign. I called the surgeon and they instructed me to come to the emergency room. Once they came in and examined me, they said right off the bat there was another infection and they needed to take the implants out. I was so devastated. I felt like I had already been through so much. I told them to take them BOTH out and I DID NOT want any other implants put in. As I tried to sleep through the night, I wondered if I was making the right decision. How would I really feel about not having any breasts at all? I also knew that mentally and emotionally, I was drained. I could not bear anymore. Well, its been almost 3 months later, and I feel AMAZING! I honestly wish I had made this decision to begin with. I thought I would be severely depressed about it, but I am not. I feel a lot more confident than I had in the past and this was indeed the best decision for me. My smile is bigger and brighter! I feel healthier and more in tune with my body. My real boobs changed my life. My implants changed my life. No boobs changed my life. No pair, don’t care! I am alive and living my best life! ---- Connect with Kiana on Instagram: @the_breast_decision_ Thank you for allowing us to share your story, Kiana! SBC loves you! SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Our Podcast Online Support Groups Free, Weekly Events

By Stacy Nardo I didn't think much of it, as breast cancer doesn't run in my family. My First Ever Mammogram It was 8 years ago. I went in for my first ever mammogram at 40 years old. My local hospital was having an event called Mammograms, Manicures, and Mocktails, and since I was always so busy with work and family, I scheduled the first slot at 4pm because I knew I would be in and out rather quickly, and I was. After the scan of my breasts, I went home and waited for the results. More Imaging I was called back for more imaging the next day, which I was told was normal for your first scan, and then was told to take a seat in the waiting room for what seemed like forever. I was brought back to the radiologist’s office to be told I most likely had breast cancer and needed to see a surgeon right away. I was then led into the Breast Cancer Center Navigator’s office, and she proceeded to help me to get an appointment with a breast surgeon the next day. I was literally in shock and couldn't believe what was happening. I remember going home and calling my husband, my parents, and my sister, and just crying and not really understanding what was going on. The Call When I saw the surgeon that next day, she saw how scared and upset I was and arranged for me to have a stereotactic biopsy that day. Waiting the next 2 days for the results seemed like forever! And then late Friday night, I got the call that I did indeed have breast cancer. The surgeon explained everything to me and said to make an appointment for Monday to come and talk to her about next steps. After I hung up the phone, I just remember crying for hours with my husband and parents by my side. How could this have happened to me? I was healthy and young and it was my first mammogram, it just made no sense to me. But at least we caught everything early so that was good. Next Steps When I had my appointment the following week, the plan was for a lumpectomy followed by 7 weeks of radiation after I healed from surgery. I wanted the surgery as soon as possible so it was scheduled for 2 weeks later, Valentine’s Day! I really didn't want this surgery on Valentine’s Day as every year it would be this reminder, but it was the soonest date she had so I took it. Everything went by so fast, and I don't think even to this day I really remember how I actually felt as I just wanted to get it out and over with and same with the treatment, as well. In talking with the surgeon about the lumpectomy, she said it would make my breast considerably smaller than the other, so I decided to have a reduction of the other breast so I wouldn't have to wear a prosthesis and have a daily reminder of the cancer. I wanted my body to be as normal as possible. So, when I had the lumpectomy, I had a surgeon reduce my other breast at the same time so I would only have to go through one surgery. As it turned out, he didn't take out enough tissue so I had to have an in-office procedure to even it out as much as possible. No two breasts are perfect- I just wanted close enough. After I was done my 7 weeks of radiation, it was time to talk about Tamoxifen . I had a lot of questions and concerns about the drug and wasn't sure it was for me. My radiation oncologist was not my favorite person, and when I asked her more about Tamoxifen and it’s side effects and benefits, I was told to buy her book! I couldn't believe she even said that to me. She is my doctor, she is supposed to answer my questions and help me through this. But she didn’t. So, I sought out another opinion and then decided Tamoxifen wasn’t for me. I did some research and then spoke to my medical oncologist, gynecologist, and surgeon, and asked them about taking out my ovaries since I had had a partial hysterectomy years before, and taking out my ovaries would mean I didn't have to take the Tamoxifen because I would have no more estrogen in my body. With my cancer being estrogen positive , not having any estrogen in my body meant there was nothing to feed the cancer, and I would be safe. So, another surgery it was. But I felt like it was the best choice for me. I would be in early, medical menopause, but that sounded better to me than taking a medication I felt was toxic and that I knew I wouldn’t do well on since I never do well with prescription medicines. Eight Years Later and Still No Cancer! But it certainly hasn’t been a great 8 years. Because of the radiation, I developed many other medical issues that they just don't tell you about. I had cataracts and had to have surgery on both eyes when I was 45. My doctor told me it was from the radiation and pretty common, but the doctors don’t tell us these things when you are getting radiation. I have also been suffering from severe exhaustion since radiation as well. I was told that 7 weeks after my radiation ended I would start to get back my energy but that has never happened. I am always tired and sometimes to the point of it being so bad I just have to sleep as I have no other choice. I have also had other health issues as well- bladder pain being one of them- and depression and anxiety, as well. and just not being in good health overall. I keep hoping for my old self back, the me before cancer, but I know it is never going to be that way again. I refuse to accept this as my new normal so I keep searching out ways to feel better, and I am sure I will find answers and don't intend on stopping until I do . I just must say one thing- I have had an amazing support system of my husband, parents, family, and friends. They have always been there for me and have helped me whenever it was needed. I am truly lucky as some people go through this alone. I am glad I never had to do that and never will! Thank you for sharing your story, Stacy. SBC supports you! SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Positive Thinking for Healing Online Support Groups

Meet Ann: Triple Negative Breast Cancer, BRCA2+, Stage 2, & Celebrating 7 Years Disease Free In November of 2012, I found myself putting off my annual mammogram which I knew I needed to take care of. I have an extensive family history of cancer, and my Mom had just passed way from metastatic endometrial cancer a few months earlier. As a result, catching up on my medical appointments was not a high priority. Though in hindsight, it certainly should have been. My Dad died in 1986 from prostate cancer when I was a junior in college. One of my sisters has had thyroid cancer and all three of us girls in my family have had skin cancer. My brother is the only one in my immediate family who has not had a cancer diagnosis and I pray that he never hears the words ‘you have cancer.’ After my initial mammogram in 2012 I was called back for additional imaging. This had happened a couple of times before, and I wasn’t all that concerned about it. When I walked into the imaging area, the same technician greeted me who had done the initial mammogram. ‘Do you know why they wanted you to come back in?’ she asked. ‘I’m guessing they just needed more images.’ I responded. Then I saw the computer screen with my mammogram up on it. I could see the two spots as bright as day, one larger than the other. More mammogram images were taken, then I was told an ultrasound would be needed. The ultrasound was conducted, and it was after that when the radiologist came in and sat down. He said in effect that there were some spots that looked ‘suspicious for cancer.’ He told me a biopsy would need to be done, and asked since I was there already did I want to do it then or come back another day? I opted to have it done then since I was there, I then went into to a small changing area and waited for the procedure room to be prepped. That’s when it hit me, I most likely have cancer. The radiologist noted that I seemed fairly calm, that’s when I told him I had just lost my Mom to cancer and couldn’t believe this was happening to me now. I have 3 siblings, 2 live out of state, and my other sister an hour away. As I got changed for the biopsy, I sent a text to my sister in Oregon saying, ‘it looks like I have breast cancer.’ The gut feeling I had was correct; it was cancer. This was confirmed after the biopsy by my primary care doctor the next day. I wasn’t surprised at all, though I was numb and a little stunned. The official word was stage 2, triple negative breast cancer, and after genetic testing I have the BRCA2 gene mutation as well. What followed was treatment that did not go as planned. It was to be surgery, chemo, then radiation. Being diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer, there was no disputing that chemotherapy was in the plans. After the first surgery the margins weren’t clear, so I was given two options: go back in and do a re-incision to get the margins clear or go straight to a mastectomy. I opted for the re-incision. From the time of my diagnosis I was hoping and praying that I wouldn’t have to undergo a mastectomy. After the second surgery I had a call from the surgeon who let me know the margins still weren’t clear, and that a mastectomy would be necessary. I sat there and let the word sink in, mastectomy. My sister was visiting and helping me after my second surgery and after I hung up with the surgeon I asked her to let my other two siblings know what the new plan was. Again, I found myself stunned and, in a fog, trying to wrap my head around this latest news. What was truly awful when I look back now, is that I started chemo not long after hearing this news that I had cancer and knowing that when I was done months later, I would have to undergo a third surgery (the double mastectomy) and have my ovaries removed due to the genetic mutation. The cancer was on the right side, but I saw no reason to have a one-sided mastectomy with my family history. What followed was months of nausea from the chemo that nothing, and I mean nothing, helped. Debilitating bone pain in my legs that was so bad I could literally hardly stand it (thank you, Neulasta!) I had made it through 10 infusions of the second chemo drug and had to stop before I could complete all 12. I was in so much pain and so miserable that I just couldn’t do it. There was no ‘final chemo’ celebration, no bell to ring, no signs stating that I was done with photos taken, etc. It came to an end when I called the nurse and told her in tears that I couldn’t come in that day as planned for chemo, I had given up, the side effects were too extreme. After some time to recover from chemo (about a month or so I believe) it was time for my last surgery. Honestly, I had been in such a fog of grief and sadness that thoughts of that final surgery hadn’t really been top of mind for me. At that point I just wanted to get it over with. I couldn’t work at all through my 8 months of treatment. The side effects from chemo were too extreme which ruled out even working part time. What followed the final surgery was the biggest surprise to me. I felt relatively ‘good’ for a month or so then came down with pneumonia. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d had pneumonia. After pneumonia, it was one virus or illness after another, and I was beyond frustrated. It wasn’t the ‘every day will feel like your birthday’ feeling that a friend and fellow survivor had told me during treatment to look forward to. After finally seeing an integrative MD about 5 months post treatment I found out that stress takes a terrible toll on the immune system, and that I went into 8 months of treatment broken down in a variety of ways. Having just lost my Mom and all the grief and stress associated with that had taken a huge toll on my body and I had absolutely no idea. Not having that important piece of information, understanding the state of my health before treatment, is what I wish had been handled differently. It’s important in my opinion, for anyone undergoing such harsh treatment for a terrible disease, to know what kind of shape they are in (other than having cancer) beforehand. What I would do if I could go back and change anything would be to have seen an integrative or functional medicine MD before chemo and find out if there was anything I could do to help my immune system and to detox from the medications. I can’t say for sure, but I would assume chemo would have gone a bit smoother, and I wouldn’t have ended up getting sick so much post treatment. My oncologist told me that in her 20 years of practice I was the one patient who had such a horrible time with chemo. I kind of wish she hadn’t told me that, but I don’t doubt it, it was awful. It was an odd feeling once I had gone through the three surgeries and 2 cycles of chemo – one of finality but not having any direction as to ‘now what?’ I believe that survivorship, and all the mental and physical aspects that come with it, should get more attention. I could have used some type of guidebook of what to expect, but I had nothing to go on. Just watching other friends go through treatment but we are all unique and handle treatment differently. Since 2013 and getting through my treatment it has taken a very long time to get my physical and mental health on track at the same time. I worked with a nutritionist, the integrative MD and others to learn as much as I could. Fast forward to today and in August I’ll celebrate being cancer free for 7 years. A big takeaway from my cancer experience is that I don’t want what I went through to be for nothing. I learned a great deal post treatment as I’ve focused on my health and that’s why I freely share my story others. In 2016 I set up my Luckygirlbyann FB Blog page and Instagram account to talk about what I learned along the way post cancer, other topics I am passionate about, along with quotes I find inspiring. What helped me get through my ‘year of living cancerously’ was the vision of a bridge and getting to the other side of it. Using the word ‘journey’ to describe going through what cancer patients do every day did not resonate with me from the beginning (nor did it resonate for Andrea). That bridge turned out to be a lot longer than I had planned on or anticipated but I did eventually cross it, and for that I am grateful. Thank you for sharing your story, Ann. SBC loves you. SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Braving Chemo Book Recommendation Breast Cancer Risk Factors Online Support Groups Read On Tripple Negative Breast Cancer in your 20's and 30's

By Mary Strong As Hell With A Story To Tell Thriver I found out wonderful things about myself. I found that I am stronger than most people I know. I really had to be. I wasn’t going to crawl into a hole and give up. I had no other choice; I have a family and a daughter. My little girl will grow up to be a stronger, better woman than I am. I found out I am not a quitter! I got a whole new look. I really wasn't that freaked out about the hair loss. I've never really had long hair as an adult, so I thought I could live with it. When would I ever really be bald again?? I covered up for almost 3 months with cute turban-style hats. But I grew tired of that. They were hot and annoyed my head from the pressure of wearing them all day. Friends and co-workers told me that no one cared about my baldness but me. That was so true. I am a teacher, so I worried about the reaction of the students. They couldn't care less. I realized that I can help others through my strength. It can be contagious. Maybe a role model, a guide, an inspiration. Whatever you want to call it. Perhaps I can show the world the way we should all live. I learned to fight for what you want. Don't give up or give in. I gained a whole new me. I was never a miserable person. Moody, I guess. Happy, yeah, pretty much. But my sister noticed that after I was over the biggest hurdles of my treatments, I seemed really happy. It didn't occur to me until she mentioned it. But as I thought about what she said, I did feel truly happier than I had ever been before in my life. This diagnosis made me truly realize I was taking life for granted. I was blessed to have all the things I did. Now, I was going to appreciate every little piece of life that was offered to me! Warrior Later, after my hair started to grow back, a student asked when I had lost my hair. He hadn't even noticed that I was bald and the hair was growing back! For my bald debut, I dressed as Charlie Brown for Halloween. I took my classroom's school pictures that year with my bald head. Often, I would forget that I was bald and be shocked when I'd see myself in the mirror. I learned not to care about my bald head. As my hair grew back and was really short, I loved it. Others loved it. I had never gotten so many compliments. I am going to embrace and keep this new short hair look. I discovered that I underwent more than a transformation. I became so much more than I ever could have imagined after those disastrous months. But what else am I? Am I a cancer survivor or fighter? Ha! I evolved into a WARRIOR! This entire journey has been surreal. Sometimes this has felt like a dream; it really didn’t happen to me. I am no one special; just an ordinary person living an ordinary life. I went to school, got a job, met a man, got married, and had a baby. The common story of life. I was one of those people who thought, “Nothing really bad is going to happen to me. My life is routine.” Well, my enemy didn’t care about ordinary or extraordinary. It just attacked. Fighter You have no choice while battling cancer. If you don’t fight, then all is lost. That was not going to happen to me. I never thought twice about fighting. I just did it. It was imperative for my family and myself. I faced 12 weeks of chemo which was followed by 4 weeks of radiation. During my radiation, I worked every day, and then on the way home, I went in for treatment. On some evenings after work and radiation, I took my daughter to her art classes, Girl Scout meetings, and book club. No defeats there. I endured 12 months of Herceptin treatments. I walked out on the last treatment feeling like winning gladiator. I conquered all the struggles this enemy put me through. Strong As Hell But this warrior’s work is not finished and may never be. After surgeries, treatments, and quarterly and biannual check ups, I still have a mental tug-of-war. For the following five years, my armor is Tamoxifen to keep the enemy at bay. I have survived treatments; my enemy was fought. But the match won’t be called for another 5 years. Yet, even then this warrior’s enemy will always be feared of making a return. As a result, I must keep training. I am strong as hell and have gained too much. My blogs: The Meager Modern Mom Living With Cancer Follow me on Instagram and Facebook: Instagram The Meager Modern Mom on Facebook Thank you for sharing your story, Mary. SBC loves you! SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Positive Thinking For Healing Online Support Groups Breast Cancer Book Club

Meet Sonja, Diagnosed With Stage 3 Breast Cancer At 35 My name is Sonja, and I am 36 years old. A year ago last summer, I began having chest pain, kidney pain, heavier periods, and other odd symptoms. The best way I could describe it was, I felt "toxic." My body was telling me something was wrong . At the time I was 35 years old. My Concerns I had a physical last July and my PCP did a pap, breast exam, and blood work. All results were normal. I expressed to her my concerns. She first referred me to a cardiologist. I went and saw this cardiologist. At my one and only appointment with him, he said "I believe if it's not your heart, it's your lungs." He ordered an echocardiogram and 48 hour heart monitor. My heart was good. He reviewed results over the phone and no other real follow ups planned. Advocating For Myself A couple days went by. I felt like I was in limbo and everything was checking out good, but I was having such odd things going on. I worked in healthcare, at a local hospital. One day at work, I just decided to call my PCP's office. I spoke to the nurse, ultimately asking for a chest x-ray to be ordered. She wasn't the easiest person to deal with because I wasn't having "symptoms" that would require this kind of test. She also wanted me to be seen, but I told her I didn't want to pay the high copay. She spoke to my doctor, and I was able to get it approved my my provider. I went and had the x-ray done right then and there. I just felt like something was wrong. The chest x-ray showed a couple tiny spots on my right lung. I was told, most times, a radiologist would overlook these spots, because they were so small. I'm so grateful this radiologist was so thorough and didn’t let it go. The radiologist recommended a CT of my lungs. I had that test done. I was then getting a call saying the spots were not coming from my lung, they were coming from my right breast and now the radiologist was recommending a mammogram and ultrasound. Mammograms are not ordered, preventatively, until a woman is 40 due to insurance not covering it so this was going to be my first mammogram. I was up to date on my physical, blood work, and routine checks for lumps in my breasts and again, everything normal. My Mammogram & Ultrasound I went and had the mammogram done. I went on my lunch break. I remember the day like it were yesterday. I checked in and was asked to put a Johnny on like a jacket. I was then explained by the technician what to expect and the mammogram was then performed. The technician would take a set of pictures, and then leave, then come back for more pictures. This happened several times. I became nervous. My stomach had that sour feeling, like something was wrong. I was then being asked to go in a cool, dark room for a breast ultrasound. The technician applied the jelly on my breast and began taking pictures. All I could see were lots of colors on the screen. She then left the room and got a radiologist. This woman viewed the screen as she moved the wand around my breast. She wiped the jelly off of my chest, sat me up, and said "I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but you have three masses in your right breast, and it doesn't look good." I said "really?" She said "I've been doing my job for 30 plus years, and I can tell you that from what I see, there is a 5 percent chance of this not being cancer." She offered to call my family or a friend for me as I cried and continued to ask questions. She told me the next step would be to biopsy the masses. I did say to her many times that I would do anything to stay alive for my little girl and I would make sure her life would not be negatively affected. To be honest, after discussing the results with the radiologist, I remember getting dressed, walking to my car, and calling my husband and parents to tell them the news. I don’t remember anything else from that day. My Husband's Health ​It was about this time my when my husband Ryan, who is 38, began having some weird symptoms of his own. He is a senior master automotive technician for Ford and was having a hard time performing his job. He was exhausted beyond belief, he was tripping, dropping tools, and his extremities on his left side became numb, very weak, and very painful. Ultimately, he was told he was overweight by a doctor that he had never seen before and was told that he probably had carpal tunnel. No imaging was ordered. We began losing weight together and we even bought him wrist splints to see if that would help his hand. Ryan's symptoms worsened, terribly. It was so bad that I was having to help him get out of bed and with many daily activities. I truly couldn't understand what was going on with either of us. Invasive Breast Cancer Diagnosis I then had my biopsies. On September 27th I was diagnosed, while taking care of primary care patients full time, with invasive breast cancer. Three masses broke through my breast wall, toward my right lung. It was also brought to my attention that a lymph node under my right armpit looked suspicious on the last imaging that I had done after the biopsies. The radiologist who diagnosed me with cancer said I needed an additional biopsy. I was bummed. I remember being at work getting this news and I could barely breathe. I'm actually grateful I was at work because my coworkers called my family. I felt completely numb and debilitated. I just wasn't sure how I was going to tell everyone. Breaking The News I remember my mom picking me up, my dad got my 3-year-old (she’s now 4 and a half) at daycare, and my mom brought me home. My parents kept my daughter overnight, and I broke the news to my husband. I don’t remember much after that. I probably went to bed, and I know I called out of work the next day. HER2+ & My Husband's Diagnosis I was then going in for another biopsy. The radiologist who performed all of them was beyond fantastic. He was so gentle and so kind. When he took the biopsy, he told me right then and there it was cancerous. He did send the lymph node to pathology and it was confirmed that the cancer had spread to my right armpit. Everything after that happened fairly fast. Ryan's condition was getting so bad that he went back and saw our PCP. She sent him to a neurosurgeon. He ordered a MRI of his cervical spine. All of a sudden, I found myself, my husband, and my parents meeting with my surgeon, medical oncologist, and radiation oncologist. I was told that my cancer was HER 2 positive and that it was quite aggressive. It was about a week apart that I was having chemo training, just having my port placed and was starting 16 rounds of aggressive chemotherapy when Ryan was getting his MRI results. He was diagnosed with severe cervical stenosis. His spine was in fact collapsed, allowing no spinal fluid to circulate properly. We were told he needed major neck surgery or he would die. We were told that he needed to be very careful until surgery or he would be paralyzed. Neither of us could fathom the news we were receiving. His surgeon was shocked with how long he was able to perform just his daily activities let alone working on cars. His job, like mine, is very demanding. His job is much more physical though. Chemotherapy I began chemo. I went to the Payson Center every Wednesday for the first 12 weeks. During that time, I was receiving, in my port, dexamethasone (steroid), herceptin, perjeta (both breast targeted medications), and taxol (chemo). My hair started falling out after probably by my 4th treatment. My husband ended up shaving my head. It was less painful and less emotional to have a buzz cut vs. having my hair fall out, especially in the shower- that was the worse. I was very emotional. I was pretty sick on this regimen. I worked for about a month, taking care of patients and then had to go out on FMLA. It was happening all around the holidays. Ryan was also not able to work. It was like our worlds were crashing around us. We couldn't let it though. We had our daughter Penni to fight for. I was having so many symptoms. My entire body felt restless, heavy, and tired. I was getting frequent bloody noses (never had one in my life), diarrhea, nausea, vomiting, headaches, neuropathy in my hands and feet, changes in my taste buds, and sensitivity to light and sound. Ryan had his surgery. He ended up needed c4-c7 fused. He required 30 staples in his neck. During this time, while he was hospitalized, I began the second part of the chemo protocol. I was going to the Payson Center every other week for four weeks. While there, I was receiving dexamethasone (steroid), the herceptin and perjeta (breast cancer targeted medications), and A.C (chemo). This chemo is so potent that I had to sign a waiver saying I understood it was flesh eating. A nurse had to push this chemo through my port by a syringe, rather than from a bag dripping. I was very sick VERY sick on this regimen. No matter what, I was staying hopeful, appreciative, and positive. The chemo put me in menopause. Any symptom that comes with this, I got. I'd have to say, the hot flashes were the worst. (This month, I have come out of menopause. This has been awful. I've had to experience two periods, lots of cramping, and emotional issues from hormones. I have a message out to my medical oncologist as I would like to have my ovaries removed. I truly think my cancer was from a hormonal issue . Ovaries are what produces hormones. I'm beyond fearful of getting cancer again. I'm also having similar symptoms that I was having when I was diagnosed.) Caregiving Ryan was released from the hospital. I was his main caregiver and he was mine. We were not able to keep our daughter in daycare due to the cost so we were taking care of her full time as well. Ryan and I can't thank my parents and sister enough, for all their support and help, especially with Penni. Ryan was receiving in-home physical therapy. I finished 16 rounds of chemo on March 22 and had surgery on April 19th. Lumpectomy, Lymphedema, & Physical Therapy I went into surgery with my pink wig on. I remember the staff loving it. I thought I was going to have a lumpectomy (the chemo worked so well it shrunk the masses substantially so I didn't need a mastectomy), and a lymph node resection (3 or 4 lymph nodes taken out from my right arm pit) that area (axilla) has 14 lymph nodes. I woke up and was told that I had the lumpectomy but that all 14 lymph nodes had to be removed as the chemo worked so well, it was not known, exactly where the cancer was. My surgeon didn't want to take any risks. He also had to make the decision to cut my intercostal brachial nerve due to finding a suspicious growth on top of that nerve. He was definitely sad about cutting a nerve but he was very concerned by the growth. I'm in physical therapy twice a week now, for lymphedema and very bad hypersensitivity. I love my physical therapist. I just found out that due to the nerve being cut and due to having no lymph nodes in that area, I will always have the hypersensitivity. I can say some days it's so bad I cant tolerate many textures from shirts, jackets, etc. Chemo Brain & Radiation I went home the same day as surgery. I was very sore. I'm still having side effects from the chemo as well as from surgery. I am still having chemo brain , and my body, by the end of the day, is so fatigued and everything feels heavy. Ryan and I continued to stay positive and take care of each other and Penni. About a month after surgery, I started my first of 35 rounds of aggressive radiation. I went Monday through Friday for seven weeks. I just completed my 35th treatment on July 22nd. It was my mom’s birthday. It was definitely more than special because I got to ring the bell on her special day. Radiation was really tough, despite the lotion I was given in the beginning to use. By the time I got to my 20th round, I was beyond exhausted and I couldn't wear any sort of bra. My skin was opening up and I couldn't sleep. I was in a lot of pain. My radiation oncologist wanted to prescribe me a burn cream but I'm allergic to sulphur medications. He said any kind of reaction to sulphur, the cream would make my symptoms worse. I just sucked it up until the end. During radiation and to this day, I continue to get the dexamethasone, herceptin, and perjeta in my port, every three weeks, until November. In November, I should be getting my port out. I'm pretty nervous about this as my experience with it being put in was awful. Cancer Free I was told in April, two days before my birthday, that my cancer was a stage three and that all the pathology results came back and I am cancer free! Yay! I truly feel like positivity is the key. I also say it every day... my family, friends and people who I have met because of this journey have helped me to not give up and to not lose hope. I stayed and continue to stay focused and determined. Hope For Ryan & Our Family Ryan and I continue to be out of work. Many of his symptoms have improved, but he's still very much struggling with a couple things like his gate, balance, pain, and numbness/tingling in his left hand and pain that goes down his leg. Ryan had a post-op MRI and they found a tumor on his spine. He is now seeing a neurologist, thinking this could be multiple sclerosis, who is conversing with an oncologist. Ryan tells me as other areas heal, he can feel what his surgeon is concerned about. The next step is... he is having another MRI in the beginning of August. If the tumor is the same size or larger, he will require a biopsy. we are hoping it's from surgery and the damage prior too instead of possibly cancer. We are worried. We know worrying is not the healthy approach but waiting is hard and for all we've been through, it's hard to not worry, quite honestly. My FMLA ran out and after 10 years of service at our local hospital and 20 years total service of nursing, I was let go. The feeling to this moment still hurts. I know I was a fantastic employee. Patient care was my top priority. I also loved what I did. After being let go, I had to scramble around, while very sick on chemo, to get us health insurance. I paid for Ryan's, Penni's, and my health insurance, dental, and life insurance through the hospital. It's sad to say but true, the health insurance is better than what I was paying through the hospital. Ryan and I lost our dental insurance. Penni has it, thankfully, because she’s a kid. It was hell feeling like things were being taken from my family and I when it was totally out of Ryan’s and my hands. I did meet with a chief officer of the hospital, expressing my sadness as well as a proposal to coach other staff members going through cancer like me, and I was heard, but shut down . It saddens me that a health care organization could actually put in writing that they are letting you go due to a major health issue. Every day I think to myself is this really happening to Ryan, Penni and I?!?! Are we really going through things that are really traumatic and significant?!? The answer to both of these questions is yes!!! We are going to be celebrating 21 years as a couple in September, and we are only in our 30s. I tell everyone Ryan and I are very grateful that we can be going through this together. He is my right side and I am his left side. Neither of us expected to be hit hard but we are truly doing the best we can and are making the best with all we have. We feel rich in so many ways. If anyone is interested, I started writing journals two days after being diagnosed. Writing has been very therapeutic for me. I write on caringbridge.org. There are many things that I journaled about that fill in all these scenarios I speak about. Thank you for reading! I'm looking to inspire and help as many people as I can. Thank you for sharing your story, Sonja. SBC loves you and your family. SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Writing As Therapy Breast Cancer Poetry Online Support Groups

Meet Rayna, Diagnosed With Breast Cancer Just Two Months After Giving Birth Hi, my name is Rayna, and I was diagnosed with stage 2, triple negative breast cancer, just 2 months after giving birth to my daughter. I have no family history of the disease. ​ I do not carry the genetic mutation. I found the lump myself, 6 weeks postpartum. After having difficulty breast feeding my daughter and having no success with the pump, my original thought was calcified milk. Cancer wasn’t even a question. I received the diagnosis just before Thanksgiving. I was both a new mom and was looking at a hard road ahead of me, with aggressive chemotherapy and possible radiation. The plan was for chemo first, to shrink the tumor in hopes to have a lumpectomy at the end of treatment. (This is referred to as neoadjuvent chemotherapy). I had triple negative invasive ductal carcinoma cancer and would receive chemo once a week for 5 months. Those 5 months, the first months of my daughter's life, went by both extremely slow and incredibly fast at the same time. Each day, I watched my daughter grow more and more right before my eyes, while I continuously contemplated what the cancer was doing inside my body. I was told by my infusion nurses that I was a trooper, that I never complained, that despite the intense amount chemo that I had to go through, I never once showed signs of defeat. And they’re right, I didn’t. Don’t get me wrong, there were plenty of times when I was overwhelmed and scared, but never once was there a thought that I wasn’t going to overcome this. I was lucky too; aside from the hair loss, side effects were minimum for me. I rarely needed my Zofran and I had only minor symptoms compared to other woman I had read about and before I knew it my last chemo session was on April 28th, 2017. The tumor had shrunk to almost nothing. I had a lumpectomy on May 31st, and I was confident the margins would be clear. I was going to be able to go on with my life. I received the call from my surgeon that my cancer went down to a stage zero, but the margins were not clean and speckled with cancerous cells throughout. We decided on a mastectomy. After all the intense chemo and all that we did to try to save my breast, I lost it anyway. 2 weeks later, I had a unilateral mastectomy with reconstruction. I had one drain in for a week, and I couldn’t lift my daughter for 3 weeks. My hair was growing back though, and after my implant exchange, which happened in August of 2017, I was finally starting to feel like myself again... sort of. I never got my period back after giving birth to my daughter, and here we are 2 years later and I’ve only had some light spotting. I had blood work done, and I’m most likely in early menopause. But that’s okay. My daughter is the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and if I can’t have another child, I’m okay with that. I’ve learned a lot about myself over the course of both my pregnancy and my cancer battle, and even though things didn’t just go back to “normal” for me, I'm okay with that. Thank you for sharing your story, Ranya. SBC loves you. SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Online Support Groups Breast Cancer Book Club Read On Tripple Negative Breast Cancer in your 20's and 30's

"I still have a life to be lived, and I am going to live it to the fullest." Without questioning, when going through a serious illness, you learn to know what faith truly is, along with finding the true meaning of beauty and how you really feel about yourself. I know this all too well because I have experienced many trials and tribulations in my life. Through it all, I gain strength that I never knew I had, and much more confidence in myself, which led me to loving myself all over again. I had a new beginning, all on my own. After going through so much in my life, things were going well, until it happened. I had a head-on collision with not only breast cancer, but colon cancer as well, and it changed my entire outlook on life. I thought I had endured rough years before but going through cancer was the rest of the iceberg. There is nothing like it. You wonder, what in life had you done so wrong to have this placed upon you. You began asking, why me. Yet through my tragedies and all that I had to endure, it all became an awakening for me, in which I received and gain all the strength and encouragement I needed to conquer. Through it all, not only did I find the true meaning of life, I found the true meaning of beauty . Through all the chemo, radiation, the pain I endured, I still felt beautiful. I found myself looking in the mirror even more during this time, because I thought what I was dealing with would change me drastically, but as I viewed the imperfections I now have to live with, over time it got better, and instead of feeling sorry for myself, I embrace it all; I'm still among the living, who am I to complain. Whether we are dealing with an illness or any other negative feelings about ourselves, our lives, and our bodies, we need to be our on-cheering section. Through all my mishaps, I still feel beautiful and it is real. I have come to realize that even going through such a dark time in my life, I still have a life to be lived, and I am going to live it to the fullest. When I think about the individuals that are no longer among us due to such a horrific disease, I'm truly grateful, and I will no longer take my life for granted, life is precious, and we don't realize that, until we come close to losing it. When I think of the “gift of life” that was given to me twice over, I knew I did not have a moment to waste. I would never say having or going through cancer is a gift, surviving it, receiving a second and third chance at life, is the gift. Yet, through it all, I did not allow the disease to take away who I am, or what I stand for. I am a survivor, as well as an example to show that it can happen, and that I can go on and look and feel just as beautiful, inside, and out, and it shines brighter. Yet through my tragedies and all that I had to endure, I received and gain all the strength and encouragement I needed to conquer. I will say, that the areas of my body that was interrupted, will be a constant reminder I had cancer, and at times, it does bother me, I'm human, but within a moment or two, I look past it, because those areas could be covered up. True beauty is within and when you feel beautiful on the inside, it shows so clearly on the outside. Just because I had cancer, does not mean cancer had me. We as women should never allow anything, or any circumstance to steal our joy, nor our self-esteem. And I know with cancer, many times you are too weak to even think about your looks, because you're not always feeling your best, believe me, I know; but sometimes you must try a little bit, and fight past it and keep living. Through any tragedy, we are and always will be beautiful and unique! Women, we all know that our bodies take lickings, yet we keep on ticking. When I look back now and see how far I've came, I have to say, I thought right away that my cancer diagnoses was truly a death sentence, because you're not sure if you're going to make it or not. Cancer have taught me not to blink twice at life, my eyes are wide open, living life to the fullest. I also realized after surviving cancer both times, that I was about to face new beginnings, new hope, do and see more with a whole new prospective on life. I share my story with others hoping to make a positive impact on someone who is ill or otherwise, where they can proceed life in a whole new way. I am 63 years of age now, and I am cherishing each day, each moment, and through it all, I feel that I am still at my best. I am confident with myself, as well as grateful. I am starting over, doing things I should have done before cancer. One day, after one of the many surgeries I had during my breast cancer period, and I could remember it as if it was yesterday, I experienced something so real, so peaceful, something of a miracle, that I had to write it down. I turned that experience into a poem, and I called it “Peace”. I took that poem, along with many others I had written, writing had become therapy for me. I am hoping that anyone who may have the opportunity to read my poems, get out of them, what I placed in them, they are as real as any could ever be. My most recent published book is titled, “Cancer, Yet Cancer Again, but I will not Die, before I'm Dead”. I titled it that, because I truly feel that you should not stop living, because you have cancer, and that is exactly what I almost did, when I heard the word cancer. I am a realist, a regular everyday woman, who have overcome many obstacles, which took me to writing, trying to produce inspirational stories. If I had not gone through all that I did, I would have never anticipated such. The scars and mishaps, that are now attached to my body, due to cancer, are just that, and they are symbols for someone else inspiration and hope. I am thankful, because if I had not struggled, I would not have found my true strengths. I am a true example that you can survive cancer, not once, but twice, providing you get to it in time. I am not saying all will be easy, I am not saying all will survive it, what I am saying, is to have faith, fight with all you have, then hold on. I honestly believe, when and if you survive a horrific tragedy or a horrible disease such as cancer, it is for a reason. You have a purpose, and through that purpose, faith, compassion, and strength, true beauty is born. Thank you for sharing your story, Karen. We love you. SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Online Support Groups Attend an Event Listen to the Podcast: Breast Cancer Conversations

By Robin K. Woodruff I was diagnosed with Stage IIa Invasive Lobular breast cancer in 2018. I already had pre-existing mental illness: bipolar disorder and generalized anxiety disorder. I was stable and doing well with my breast cancer treatment until I reached the 3rd week of radiation. The radiation fatigue started kicking in, and, as a result, I became more emotional. I felt like a slept for almost a month afterwards. Just as I was getting back on my feet, I started Tamoxifen, being premenopausal. However, I was told to stop taking Paxil as it would interfere with the metabolism of Tamoxifen. Within a week, I was bed-ridden with depression and went back on Paxil. After another try, I opted to get Lupron injections so I could take aromatase inhibitors instead. I was given the shot the same day as my appointment with the oncologist when I made this decision, so I didn’t have time to research and I wasn’t given any information about its risks and side effects. I started going downhill after being put into artificial menopause and struggled with severe fatigue caused by Femara. I slowly spiraled over the next few months , so I didn’t realize what was happening. I had my next Lupron shot 3 months later in November. By late January, I realized I was in trouble. I quit the Femara to try to see if it was the cause of my problems. That wasn’t it, so I deduced it was the Lupron and did some investigating. I was shocked to find out that Lupron can trigger mania in people with bipolar. Suddenly, I realized what was happening and called the oncologist. He told me to call the psychiatrist. I did, and he worked with me to try to get the mania under control. However, since the Lupron is a long-lasting shot, I couldn’t just discontinue it, but had to wait for it to leave my body. I was put on an atypical antipsychotic, but it still didn’t reign in my mania. I wasn’t sleeping, and I was manically making art. Eventually, I turned to alcohol to try to cope. All that lead me to being admitted into a behavioral health unit (psych ward). Even then I wasn’t getting under control. Finally I was put on Vraylar and things started to improve. A few months later, I had my ovaries out so I could take the aromatase inhibitors without the Lupron by putting me into menopause. The oophorectomy was no big deal, and I was happy with my decision . Then I tried every AI, but the fatigue was intolerable, so I decided to discontinue endocrine therapy. My mood stayed stable after that. But eventually, I did end up having a double mastectomy with DIEP flap reconstruction since I found out I had the BRCA2 mutation following all the above (a whole other story). I did really struggle with that decision, and had a really hard time the first week, really regretting my decision due to the excruciating pain. However, as I improved, I knew I made the right decision . I am 4 years out and no recurrence, but I wish I would have known what I was getting into with all the treatments and how they impact functioning and mental health. Thank you for sharing your story, Robin. SBC love you! SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Our Podcast Online Support Groups Free, Weekly Events The Podcast: Breast Cancer Conversations. Listen Now

A Stage 3 Survivor Shares Her Story With Incredible Detail And Inspiring Resilience Hello, I'm Alicia. I am a voice of hope and enjoy telling people my story because, although the stories are similar, I was 27 years old when I felt my lump and survived stage 3. I was 27 years old living the life I thought you were supposed to with the exception of drinking. I worked out 4x a week, and was not considered obese. Around Christmas, I was in the shower when I noticed a ball type look in my right breast above my nipple. I immediately began checking myself as you are taught, with the one arm up over your head, etc. and the mass moved around and it felt not round but more oblong. Any chance in my head that this was breast cancer went out the door because at the time you were taught its rounder and doesn’t move or have "play." The other thing that kept me thinking was that I was invincible; the fact that women weren’t expected to get a mammogram until after the age of 40 years old. With that being said I let it go, and didn’t listen to all the other symptoms that came up over the next year and a half. For example, I felt pain under the same side of my armpit as the lump in my breast. The pain started an inch lower than the lump (but still on the same side), and after working out I was more and more fatigued which made zero sense due to the fact that your cardio should be going the opposite way. When I turned 29 (years old) in 2011, and had received health insurance, my mom harassed me to get my “yearly” done because, years before my grandma had a grapefruit sized benign tumor in her cervix area removed. There was no concern to my breast because of all the reasons stated above but also, my mom felt the lump at one point and said it was more of a plugged milk duct feeling. I went to the doctor and mentioned 10 other things that I was concerned about and then said, “Oh yeah, there’s this lump in my breast.” After the Dr. checked she scheduled me for a mammogram and then an ultrasound. Even then, the tech said 60% of the women my age who had a lump found it to be benign. I sat in the waiting room watching women come in and out who were told by the nurse, "Congrats you’re good till next year," I started to realize I’m not going to be that lucky. It was shortly after that the radiologist called me into his office. I remember it being a dark room with my X-ray on the screen, and he said, “See that image? That’s your tumor and that’s cancer.” Just as matter of fact as can be. I was then rushed to get a biopsy, and after a long wait, a doctor confirmed that I had cancer. I was rushed to the oncologist and breast surgeon. It was all so fast. Chemo. And the side effects. And just when I started to feel better it was time for another round. Before I could take a deep breath, I was scheduled for a mastectomy. Once I recovered, my cancer had changed from stage 2 to stage 3. And now radiation. Radiation was its own mess. My mastectomy scar opened up and became infected - but we couldn’t stop the radiation so there was packing involved and I kept going. I received 3rd degree burns on top of burns with little relief. Then of course the fatigue never changed. My first tattoo was a radiation tattoo. I spent my 30th bday in the radiation room where the staff surprised me and my wife with a bunch of orange confetti, orange flowers, and orange candy, etc. Because orange has been a favorite color of mine since I was 8 years old. After having people stare at my una-boob for several months, because my heart rate was unable to be down long enough for a bilateral mastectomy, I finally received the left-side mastectomy in 2012. Now its 7 years later. I’ve had a hysterectomy, been put in medical menopause, and I’m on a hormone blocker since I was ER positive. The most important thing is..... I am cancer free! Thank you for sharing your story, Alicia. SBC loves you. SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Breast Cancer Symptoms Online Support Groups

By Kristen Carter Dear Kristen, My question is, what tips could you give to avoid “scanxiety?” I am trying to reduce the stress and anxiety when I hear I have to see another specialist or have more testing completed. A.A. Dear A.A., In the same way we can imagine beautiful futures like a cure for cancer and watching our grandchildren thrive, we can imagine the most horrific futures: progression, painful treatment, devastating side effects, death. Imagination is a uniquely human capacity, designed to help us anticipate the future and plan accordingly. But sometimes we imagine the possibilities and let them scare the bejeebers out of us, without taking the next step and doing the planning. I believe one of the biggest reasons scanxiety is so powerful over our imaginations is that when we fear test results, we not only imagine the worst, we assume that we will not be able to cope with it. That we will be helpless bystanders, and overwhelmed victims of what we learn. Instead, let’s talk about all the ways you–all of us–can plan and to cope. What I offer you today is a skill for handling whatever comes your way , one you can use with scan anxiety, seeing a new doctor, having more tests, and even the life stresses that have nothing to do with breast cancer. Here’s what I recommend Think about what you have overcome so far in your life. I imagine it’s a lot. Write down a few of those tough situations, leaving a few lines between each one. Then think about the strengths and inner resources you used to pull you through those hard times. Name and write down any inner assets that helped you cope. Did you rely on hope? Persistence? Digging for information? Humor? Your spirituality? Courage? Love for your family? The support of friends? Teamwork? Perspective? These same qualities are the ones that will help you deal with any new challenge that comes your way. A great way to find out more about your strengths is by taking the VIA Assessment of Character Strengths, which can be done for free at www.viacharacter.org (an inexpensive but very informative report is also available). It’s been taken by more than 15 million people worldwide and is one of my very favorite tools for helping clients discover what makes them strong. After taking the survey, add some of your new-found strengths to step two, above. Feel how empowering it can be to know that you can tap into all these qualities any time. They are baked into your personality and available at a moment’s notice. Next time you begin over-imagining the awful things that could happen, remember two things: One: You get to choose the stories you tell yourself, and Two: You are equipped to handle what comes your way. Wishing you strengths and a calm mind and body, A.A. Much love, Kristen

There is no question that breast cancer is a serious and scary topic, but raising awareness and much-needed funding doesn’t have to be. Creating and participating in fundraising activities to provide programs, education, and community support to those diagnosed and their loved ones can be empowering and eliminate feelings of helplessness. At Survivingbreastcancer.org , we’re sharing a few ideas for unique and sometimes silly ways to raise money for breast cancer. Some suggestions are virtual while others are in-person projects. VIRTUAL PINK HAIR DYE CHALLENGE For people looking for fun ways to amuse one another while at home, issue a challenge to a group of friends or associates to dye their hair (temporarily) pink. It can be their whole head or streaks of pink throughout their hair. Participants can use hair products or even use Kool-Aid to take the challenge. Show off your new look and have everyone take a photo to post on their social media accounts. Charge a fee to participate and ask them to involve their social media contacts by encouraging donations. VIRTUAL CAKE-DECORATING CONTEST Combine the artistic abilities and food skills of your friends with a virtual cake-decorating contest. Charge a small entrance fee for participants, and sell cake decorating kits for maximum convenience. This way, supporters will have everything they need to create their cake masterpiece with minimal effort. Encourage participants to decorate their cakes in any way they’d like. Each participant will then upload a picture of their cake to an online portal, and other supporters and community members will vote on the top cakes digitally! VIRTUAL COOKING CLASS With so many pictures of food posted online, it’s not a big leap to offer a cooking class to your network of friends and family. Put on an apron and channel your inner Julia Child, or consider asking a local chef to host a class. Charge a fee to watch and then schedule a second meetup or post photos of how the dish turned out for each participant. VIRTUAL SOIRÉE Who doesn’t like a party? Ship each guest a “party in a box” for a festive atmosphere on screen; party boxes could include favors (hats, leis), tiny decorations (paper lanterns, mini-umbrellas for drinks), or even food and drink (pie-in-a-jar, drink mix). Ask guests to make a donation to participate, but also donate the money they would have spent on party favors to breast cancer research and support. VIRTUAL GAME NIGHT Host a virtual game night with a group of friends. Among the various virtual card games on PlayingCards.io is Remote Insensitivity , which is basically a free online version of Cards Against Humanity . Jackbox is another option with a variety of hilarious games available for individual purchase or in party packs, and Skribbi is essentially digital Pictionary . PINK PUMPKIN DECORATING CONTEST Pumpkin carving and decorating contests are seasonal favorites in the fall. What better way to create breast cancer awareness and raise funds during Breast Cancer Awareness month than by making it a pink pumpkin decorating contest? Charge a fee to participate and ask a local business to display the pumpkins with collection jars next to each one. The pumpkin with the most jar donations wins! PINK GARDEN CONTEST Turn those green thumbs pink! This may require additional planning, but the results are well worth the effort. Invite friends or work with your local garden club or organization to plan, plant, and display a pink garden. Participants pay a fee to compete, and when the gardens bloom, you can raise additional funds and awareness by hosting a garden tour. GUYS-IN-PINK CAR WASH This is a twist on the typical car wash, which is a fundraising classic. Instead of a regular old car wash, ask the men in your life to dress up in breast cancer pink and start washing cars. Any money raised from the car wash is donated to breast cancer research and support. PINK LEMONADE STAND Who can say no to a kid selling lemonade, especially when it’s for a good cause? Get the kids involved with a pink lemonade stand. Make extra money by combining it with a yard sale. PINK FLAMINGO FLOCKING Purchase a flock of pink plastic flamingos lawn decorations (you can purchase pink flamingos inexpensively from Amazon ). Pick 10 yards in your community to be the lucky recipients. Attach note cards to the flamingos’ necks with a phone number and your 3-Day donation information. State that for a $10 donation, the flamingos will be removed, but for $15, they will be moved to the lawn of their choice. Make sure you also place a sign that has your contact name and phone number among the flamingos for those who drive by and would like to have the flamingos placed in a friend’s yard. These are just a few ideas to get you started. Please follow our fundraising guidelines and let us know how it went! And, of course, we welcome your donations at any time!

By Amy Banocy “After” isn’t the end. It’s the beginning of a different kind of becoming. Because cancer leaves reminders. In scar tissue. In muscle tightness. In phantom pain and itching (oh my god - the worst!). In altered relationships. In the fear that still shows up during follow-ups and scans, and every time you feel something “off” in your body. But it also leaves strength and resiliency. A fierce devotion to authenticity and living this one precious life the best way we can. A deep knowing of what matters and what doesn’t. A reconnection with Self (your Soul Self with a capital S) We get to carry both. It’s a duality. We get to feel pissed off that we still have limitations and proud that we keep showing up anyway. We get to cry because it’s still hard, and celebrate how far we’ve come. We get to rewrite the narrative of what being a survivor even means. Because we get to define what comes next. Not society. Not a f*cking pink ribbon or the ring of a bell. Not the people who say, “Aren’t you just glad to be alive?” (Yes, I am. And also, please stop.) To my fellow survivors: If no one told you lately… it’s okay if your survivorship doesn’t look like anyone else’s. It’s okay if your body still aches. If your emotions are still on a rollercoaster. If you’re still figuring it all out. You’re allowed to feel everything. You’re meant to feel everything. Full permission to evolve. To rest. To rage. To dance. To reclaim. To begin again and again and again. There is no timeline, my love. There is no script. And there sure as sh*t is no one-size-fits-all version of this life as a survivor. There’s just your truth. And that’s more than enough. I love you! Photo credit: Paula Simons Photography Connect with Amy: https://www.instagram.com/amybanocy/ Share your poetry: https://www.survivingbreastcancer.org/submit-breast-cancer-story SurvivingBreastCancer.org Resources & Support: Podcast Weekly Meetup s Free Events

By Kimberly Stephenson After a mammogram, the answers to questions like “Did anything look abnormal?” and “How serious is the abnormality that was found?” help radiologists and physicians to determine your BI-RADS score. Your BI-RADS score is an acronym for ‘Breast Imaging Reporting and Database System’. The score ranks the findings from mammogram screenings into a small number of well-defined categories. BI-RADS scores are used to convey to doctors how concerned radiologists are about the findings. The information obtained by the radiologist is efficiently summed up in that one number. While this test cannot medically diagnose breast cancer, it can help to identify anything atypical. However, it is important to note that not all abnormal findings are considered cancerous. What Does the BI-RADS Scoring System Tell Us? Doctors use the BI-RADS scheme to place abnormal findings into categories. The categories range from 0 to 6, and are as follows: Category 0 : A score of 0 indicates an incomplete test. The mammogram images may have been difficult to read or interpret. This could happen, for example, if you moved at the precise moment the picture was taken. In some cases, doctors may want to compare these new images with older ones to determine if there have been any changes. A BI-RADS score of 0 requires additional tests and images to provide a final assessment. Category 1: A score of 1 indicates a negative result. This score is good news. It means that your mammogram has no evident signs of cancer, your breast has equal density, and no well-formed mass was found. However, you should continue to have routine screenings even after a BI-RADS score of 1. Category 2: A score of 2 indicates a negative result but with benign findings. Your mammogram is normal, with no apparent cancer, but other findings (such as benign cysts or masses) are described in the report. Routine visits are suggested with this score. Category 3: A score of 3 indicates that findings are probably benign. This score is not so black and white, as the findings imply that your mammogram results are probably normal , but there is a 2% chance of cancer. You will be asked to follow up with a repeat mammogram within six months. If you have a family or personal history of breast cancer, the radiologist may opt to do more tests sooner rather than later. Regular visits help avoid multiple and unnecessary biopsies and can confirm an early diagnosis if cancer is found. Category 4: A score of 4 indicates suspicious findings or abnormalities . This level is where concern for breast cancer risk begins to increase . In this instance, there is a 20% to 35% chance of cancer. To verify, your doctor will need to perform a biopsy to test a small tissue sample. This score is split into three additional categories based on the doctor’s level of suspicion: 4A - Low suspicion for cancer or malignant findings (more than 2% but no more than 10%) 4B - Moderate suspicion for cancer or malignant findings (more than 10% but no more than 50%) 4C - High suspicion for cancerous or malignant findings (more than 50% but less than 95%) Category 5: A score of 5 indicates highly suspicious findings. In this instance, there is at least a 95% chance of breast cancer. A biopsy is highly recommended to confirm results and determine the next steps for treatment. After biopsy, the average rate of carcinoma in category 5 is about 75-97%. Category 6: A score of 6 indicates a known biopsy with proven malignancy . You can only score a 6 after you’ve had a biopsy and received a diagnosis for breast cancer. Mammograms may be used in this way to see how well the cancer is responding to treatments such as chemotherapy, surgery, and/or radiation. How Do BI-RADS and Breast Density Relate? Two main types of tissue make up the breast: fibroglandular tissue and fatty tissue. On mammograms, Fibroglandular tissue appears dense, whereas fatty tissue does not. Most women have both dense and non-dense (fatty) tissues. The volume of dense tissue compared to the amount of non-dense tissue in your breast is commonly described as your breast density. Dense breasts have less fatty tissue, meaning they are more likely to develop cancer in comparison with less dense breasts with more fatty tissue. The volume of dense tissue in your breast can be measured by radiologists by using BI-RADS. It is important to note that although breast density can be seen on a mammogram, it is not related to the actual size or even the feel of your breasts. Breast density varies from person to person and can even change over time as we get older. BI-RADS also classifies breast density into 4 categories. They are as follows: Mostly fatty - Breasts are composed almost entirely of non-dense (fatty) tissue Scattered Density - Breasts are composed mainly of non-dense (fatty) tissue, with some scattered areas of dense tissue. Consistent Density - Breasts are composed of a mixture of non-dense (fatty) tissue and dense tissue. Extremely Dense - Breasts are composed of almost entirely dense tissue Breast density is important because the denser the breast, the harder it is to detect abnormalities. Normal dense breast tissue looks white on mammograms. Breast masses or tumors also look white, so dense tissue can hide some tumors. However, this does not mean that you should be alarmed if you have dense breast tissue. It simply means that you should speak with your health care provider about your overall breast cancer risk. Regardless of the density of your breast, it is important to keep up with your mammograms! Does a BI-RADS Score of 5 Always Equate to Cancer? Although this is a seemingly straightforward question, the answer is not. The use of BI-RADS can aid in standardized reporting, steering decision-making, and operating as a useful tool in collecting medical data. Each BI-RADS ranking reflects an increased suspicion of breast cancer diagnosis. When a patient is given any BI-RADS score, a cancer diagnosis cannot be wholly confirmed. The score simply assists doctors in communicating your mammogram results while determining the right course of treatment. The main goal of any biopsy with BI-RADS category 5 is to validate the diagnosis and scope of an obviously malignant lesion. Additional diagnostic procedures, particularly imaging and possibly biopsy of the axillary lymph nodes, will almost always be necessary. Although a BI-RADS score of 5 highly suggests malignancy, it does not necessarily provide a complete cancer diagnosis. The only solidified fact is that appropriate action should be taken for the health and well-being of the patient. Whether your BI RADS score is 0 or 5, knowing and understanding your score will help ensure that you get the appropriate follow-up after your mammogram. It is part of what you need to know to actively take part in and make informed decisions regarding your medical care. Check out our Podcast with Dr. Paula Gordon , a Radiologist from Vancouver on mammography and screening! To read a personal story from one of our thrivers regarding mammographs and breast density, check out Leslie’s Story !